tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-57846464552099804562024-02-19T07:16:21.298-08:00Zeb's Theological MusingsThe Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.comBlogger26125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-46833262374285029562018-09-22T19:47:00.001-07:002018-09-22T19:53:54.372-07:00Saying Goodbye to Our Puppy<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">I still remember the first time I saw him. It was just a picture of a sweet, 2 week old puppy. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">He had been rescued along with his siblings and his mother. I fell in love with him instantly, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">a kind of fierce love that let me know he was meant to be my puppy. I got in touch with the </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">rescue right away and he was earmarked as mine. </span></div>
<b id="docs-internal-guid-a806b103-7fff-008b-1263-ca2c036fa4a2" style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">He came home to us, alongside his brother when he was 8 weeks old. We were their fosters, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">taking care of them as they got neutered and got ready for adoption. Our older dog, Keeva was </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">so excited to have puppies in her life. She watched them sleeping in the crate, these sweet, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">precious puppies. They slid on the ice in our backyard and filled our world with late night </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">bathroom breaks and laughter. We handed his brother off to his family when they were 12 </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">weeks, and we signed his adoption papers. Zeke was ours. This little puppy, who was learning </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">and growing. I thought he would be a part of our household until the day he died. I wanted to do </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">so much for him. I wanted him to only know joy and love. We have pictures of him laying on top </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">of Keeva, this little rambunctious ball of life.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">He grew and we saw the first signs of potential issues in his puppy class. I worried that we had </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">brought him to be trained too late. But we tried. He was separated from the rest of his class by a </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">partial wall because the first time he walked into class, he let out a high pitched whine. He was </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">nervous and excited and couldn’t contain himself. The trainers said he needed to be evaluated </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">and they set up a first evaluation. The trainer who was evaluating him never got back to us for </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">a second evaluation, though we tried to contact her. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">But he loved Keeva, and we were committed to helping him learn how to walk past other dogs </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">without being scared. We were busy, and trying to get trainers to answer us was hard. We </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">worked with him, but it was never perfect. We just kept trying. We could only do what we knew </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">and I’m not sure we ever knew enough. We called trainers, but there was no reply. And to be </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">honest, at our old house, he only had a few scrapes with Keeva, relatively minor. Most of the </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">time they curled up together and came to us for belly scratches. We did what we could.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">He always wanted to be so close to us, dropping the full weight of his body against our chests, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">like he was trying to merge into us, becoming one with us. He would roll over and stick his stomach </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">up in the air, wanting belly scratches. His favorite place in our bed was under the covers between us. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">He would lay his head on our legs and be so content. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Then this summer, as he approached 18 months, there was an incident with the neighbor’s 5 lb dog. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">I was at a church retreat and the dogs accidentally got out of the fenced backyard while Jamie was </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">there with them. He followed them and the little dog decided to jump toward them. Jamie thinks they </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">thought it was a game. They didn’t seem to be vicious, but they didn’t stop and the dog died. I was </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">wracked with guilt, and both dogs were placed on a 10 day bite hold. They stayed in the same pen </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">together at the ARL and I was so worried that Zeke would get excited and something would happen. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">That something never did happen and they came back into our care. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">We started looking at moving. We discovered that we could actually buy a house, and we found the </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">perfect place. They would get a large backyard in a neighborhood where we could start fresh. We </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">moved in and it was and still is a perfect house for us. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">But moving proved to be too much for our reactive pup. He started jumping at all the sounds. And </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">as he ramped up, he started jumping Keeva too, getting into skirmishes. We doubled down and tried </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">to find a trainer with renewed energy. We separated the dogs when he was likely to be excited and </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">worked hard on training him the best we could. It was hard, but we did find a trainer finally. We had a </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">date. We just had to work with Zeke and wait until we could get professional help.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">But that date would never come. Instead, Friday came. I didn’t even want to go to work that afternoon, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">but I was scheduled and I knew I would be okay once I got there. A few hours into my shift I got a call </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">from Jamie. The dogs had a bad fight and he thought his hand was broken. Evidently they had been </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">curled up, relaxed and happy, when a big banging noise outside startled Zeke. He immediately went </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">after Keeva. Jamie tried to break it up, and a bite intended for Keeva instead went into Jamie’s hand. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">It was one of the hardest hours of my life as I contacted supervisors and waited for backup so I could </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">go home. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Thank God my parents happened to be in town to help me deal with what was going on. I took Jamie </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">to the hospital and then, on his insistence, left him there while I went with my mother to take each dog </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">to the veterinary hospital. Zeke was taken first. He was in pain and still filled with adrenaline. He </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">freaked out as the vet took him back because he saw another dog. They asked for permission to </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">sedate him so they could care for him. The last time I saw my puppy, my Zeke, the dog who crawled </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">into my lap, who loved to run with me and was obsessed with his toys, was as he bucked and barked </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">while being taken into the back room by the vets. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">I got a hold of the rescue whom we had gotten him from and asked for them to pick him up from the </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">hospital. We would pay for his bills, but we couldn’t take care of him any more. Jamie’s hand was </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">broken and Keeva was in rough shape too. We had to protect everyone. He needed to not be in our </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">home. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">It was a long night, going from the VA to another hospital with Jamie, having a hand surgeon clean </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">out his wounds and begin preparing him for surgery to put pins in his hand. I came back home to </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Keeva, whom my parents had picked up from the hospital, and laid down next to her at 4 am. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">She cried. I cried. I kept my hand on her as we fell asleep together. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">And now it is Saturday. Jamie is still in the hospital. Keeva is home, mostly sleeping as I go back and</span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;"> forth between her and Jamie. And as I get close to bed, all I can think of is Zeke. He is so loving, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">yet a part of him is broken. I don’t believe in demons, but if I thought an exorcist could take his </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">reactivity away from him, I would contact one in a second. Just yesterday I was curled up on the </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">couch with him, his full weight pressing into my stomach, his tongue showering me with kisses. </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Mom told me it is parental guilt, the thoughts I have that I somehow failed him, that I wasn’t enough. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Intellectually, I know she’s right, but I still hold the shame of this moment. I still beat myself up for not </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">finding a trainer sooner, even though I tried. Shame tells me I didn’t try hard enough. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">I know that in the end, I didn’t do anything wrong. I tried. I fought hard to help this little guy. I was </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">devoted to him. From the second I first saw him, I loved him. And now, out of love, I have to say </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">goodbye. His toys are still scattered around the house. His bowl lays in the kitchen. I still expect to </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">see his face in the window when I walk up to the door. But this time, he’s not coming home. Not to </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">my home. He has to find another one. He is on his own journey now, separated from us, who have </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">raised him and loved him from the beginning, who saw his face and had to call him ours. I can only </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">imagine how he’s reacting as they try to help him adjust. I worry that he may still end up being put </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">down, though I know who he is 98% of the time. He is funny and quirky and in love with people. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">He just can’t be with other dogs because of his issues. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b><br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">I sat in the backyard tonight, watching Keeva walk slowly through the grass. </span><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">I looked up to the moon </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">and I asked where the resurrection could be in this moment. Where would the healing come from? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">How could this time of deep pain be transformed into something more? I don’t have any answers, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">but I looked up to the moon, and I prayed what I pray when I have no words left to say, trusting that </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">a mother who watched her son die on a cross can carry my pain with her too. “Hail Mary, full of grace, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst all women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners now and in the hour of our death. Amen.” I trust that this </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">woman who has felt the deepest sorrow a human can feel can carry my sorrows too. And as she said </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre;">goodbye, I say goodbye too. </span></div>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Goodbye Zeke. Goodbye my sweet little puppy, so full of life. Goodbye to your beautiful smile and </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">your cute little spots around your nose. Goodbye to you jumping up into my lap and pressing into me. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Goodbye to letting you under the covers and feeling your boney little chin on my leg. Goodbye to </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">tossing your balls endlessly down the halls and running around with you in the backyard. Goodbye to </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">your gigantic smile as you jog by my side. Goodbye to you talking to us in whimpers as you </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">impatiently sit for your food. Goodbye to you licking Keeva’s face and trying relentlessly to get her to </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">play with you. Goodbye to all the love and laughter you brought into our lives. I wish I could have had </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">you until your dying day. I pray your death is in at least a decade. You have so much still to offer. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">I love you Zeke. From the moment I saw your squishy little puppy face, I was devoted to you. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">May Mary carry you as you go off into the unknown. Goodbye. </span></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-68484175731521642672018-04-23T05:01:00.003-07:002018-04-23T05:01:51.941-07:00What does it mean to have a good shepherd?<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>Preached at St. Stephen's Episcopal Church, Newton IA 4/22/18</i></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><i>Texts: Psalm 23, John 10:11-18</i></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;"><br /></span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">On Maundy Thursday we stripped the altar. All the color was drained from this place. It lay empty, </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">barren. As I stared at the starkness, I thought about how brave that act was. I imagined what that </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">would be like if this place was permanently stripped, the building sold, the congregation dispersed.</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;"> It’s one of the fears that looms in many parishes. What if we don’t make it? What if, even after all the trials and struggles, all the learning and growing together with God, all the history, the doors are </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">shut and the people who are left searching. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">I don’t think our parish is even close to the situation of </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">closing the doors, but I recognized the fears in </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">that moment. We have similar fears in our </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">relationships, in our workplaces, in our national life </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">together. A couple fears separation as they grow </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">apart. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">There are rumors that the company is about </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">to pack up and move on. Our nation hints at war. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">How brave it is to strip the altar, both in our building and in our hearts, to face those fears head on. </span></div>
<b id="docs-internal-guid-0694987d-f258-ed41-edb8-bbcd0a2b7113" style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">It can be like facing the valley of the shadow of death, like watching the wolves circling in the </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">distance, ready to pounce. It’s frightening. In those moments, I know I feel out of control. I’m just </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">bumping into others trying to find an escape route. It doesn’t matter what happens to those around </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">me because in those moments, I’m searching for survival. That’s what matters most. Survival. It is </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">my greatest want, my greatest desire, and I’d do anything to make that happen. To keep the </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">congregation together, to save the relationship, to keep the job, to bring our nation to where I want it </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">to be. I’d do anything. In those moments, I at least, really feel like a sheep. I’m confused, I’m lost, I </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">want direction. Any direction. I need someone who can stand above the herd and guide it, because I </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">can’t guide myself. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">I wonder how many times I have been led astray by someone like the hired hand. They look good, </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">they talk a good talk, but in the end, I can see their backside as they run off, leaving me alone to </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">face my fears. My survival is not their concern. They are concentrating on their own. They are, in the </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">end, a sheep elevated to a higher status. They can peek above the herd a little, but their survival is</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;"> most important to them. They will leave everyone else if they can ensure they will live. They are like</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;"> us. They are at least like me. They are not shepherds, they are sheep in the shepherd’s clothing. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">In the moments of weakness, of fear, when the predictions become reality, it can feel like there is no </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">guide, no leader, no authority. There’s just a flock running afraid, scattering, trying to survive as all </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">feels like it’s falling apart. It is a crucifixion moment. We watch all our hopes, our desires, our </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">dreams, hang on a cross. It’s heart wrenching. We stand like Mary, watching her son slip away. It </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">may feel like we will never laugh again, never feel moments of peace. Everything is completely </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">broken.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">So what does it mean in these situations to have a good shepherd? If we can still feel all the pain, if</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">things still go incredibly wrong, then what is the point of having this leader? </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">Our good shepherd does not always save us from the incredible pains of life, but our shepherd is </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">willing to feel them with us. He would freely lay down his life for us. He weeps when we weep. He </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">feels the power and disorientation of our crucifixion moments because he’s been there. He descends </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">into hell with us, feeling the pain as things seem to only get worse and worse. He stays right </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">alongside us as we spend time in our own tombs. He never abandons us, never runs after his own </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">survival. Rather, he takes our stripped altars, our bare vulnerability, our woundedness, and holds it </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">tenderly. He seeks us out when we are lost. Even though we may walk through the valley of the </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">shadow of death, we don’t have to fear the evil, because Christ is with us. His rod and his staff </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">comfort us. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">After the wolves have disbursed, as things quiet down, he tenderly gathers us back together, </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">cradling us in his arms as a mother cradles her hurt toddler. He tends to our wounds, wishing he </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">could take away all the lingering pain. Then the good shepherd, the one who lays down his life freely </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">for us, also takes it back up again. He slowly breathes resurrection life into us. It is not a quick </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">process, but it is an effective one. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">Slowly we begin to dream new dreams. We’re able to see more than just a few feet ahead of us. We </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">may even laugh a true laugh, a sound that may not have escaped our lips for years. While we still </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">have our nail holes and the wounds in our sides, we are able to share life in community again. We’re </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">able to care again. The pain isn’t overwhelming. The pain instead becomes transformative. It’s </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">something we can use to strengthen others on their journeys, helping them to know that they are not </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">alone. We are resurrected with Christ. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">These life crucifixions can be large or small. A parish could shut its doors, but it could also die to </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">former ways and find new resurrected life. I certainly don’t think this congregation is on the path of </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">closure any time soon. But we are on a crucifixion path that requires that requires the death of </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">defeatist ways, ways that see the wolves of the world coming and run in fear. We know that no </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">matter what, our good shepherd will be beside us. Christ will guide and lead us through it all. Under</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;"> Christ’s direction, we can find resurrection, dying to our own uncertainties and being born anew into</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;"> people certain of Christ’s leadership over us. </span></div>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;"><br class="kix-line-break" /></span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">That is the gift of the good shepherd. No matter what happens, whether it is the worst possible </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">scenario, a minor set back, or a call towards a new way of being, Christ is along the path with us, </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">gathering us and leading us. We are never alone. Even when the wolves attack, Christ will not run </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">away in survival mode. Christ is taking this entire journey by our side. We need not be afraid </span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.7999999999999998; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;">because he holds the key to resurrected and transformed life.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap; white-space: pre;"><br /></span></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-80852728726191701292018-03-14T06:16:00.000-07:002018-03-14T06:28:35.519-07:00Snakes and Salvation <div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">A Sermon Preached at St. Stephen’s, Newton 3/11/18</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Texts:</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Numbers 21:4-9</span></div>
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">John 3:14-21</span></div>
<b id="docs-internal-guid-dbb74028-24aa-07cc-e338-d475e39efe63" style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Sometimes I have to sit a while with a text because it bothers me. Our first reading today </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">bothered me. I found myself turning to commentaries only to find they were moving quickly </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">past the question that was on my mind. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">In our first text today, the people of Israel speak against God as they often did on their forty </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">year wander in the wilderness. They were well into their journey. Miriam and Aaron, Moses’ </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">sister and brother were both dead, and Moses was leading people who were growing older </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">and crankier with the arrangement. And in return, the LORD got cranky with the Israelites. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Or so it seemed. The texts says that the LORD sent poisonous serpents among the people. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Some commentators say the word should be fiery, one even imagining that these were </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">winged seraphs, flying fiery snakes in the sky. I’m not sure I would go that far, but the imagery</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">is striking. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">The whole story of God bringing snakes to kill God’s own people makes me uncomfortable. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">It bothers me. And it’s in line with stories that are equally disturbing, Noah building an ark so </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">the world can be destroyed, the LORD bringing plagues upon Pharaoh's household after </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">hardening Pharaoh’s heart, eventually killing people’s children, the list compiles as the books </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">unfold. I can see where people get the idea of a scary Old Testament God who needed to </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">sacrifice his own kid as some ultimate release of anger against humanity. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">But what if we could view this with a different lens? What if we allow the text to be more </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">human than divinely scripted? What if it were a text written by people trying to figure God out?</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">People trying to find their place worshipping one God in a world that had both good and </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">trickster gods, ones that created both joy and woe? What if they were building their </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">relationship with God and didn’t have it all figured out just yet? What if the whole book is an </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">exploration of the divine by humanity, holy not because it is always right, but because it allows</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">us to be both bothered and blessed, helping us critically examine our faith and our life, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">connecting us with our ultimate source of life in new and profound ways? </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">I officially became an Episcopalian five years ago. I had come to seminary searching, and </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">found a community that just did things differently. Ultimately it was the Book of Common </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Prayer that won my heart, weaving scripture and prayer together in ways that are both </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">ancient and profound. That weaving, that subtle movement between prayer and scripture, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">especially in the daily offices, which are Morning Prayer, Noonday Prayer, Evening Prayer </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">and Compline, my relationship with the Bible changed. I had always studied it, but never </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">really prayed with it. Maybe the Psalms, but certainly never a book like Numbers. But I found </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">that in weaving scripture and prayer together, reading scripture in a prayerful state, I could </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">encounter God in a new and exciting way. I could examine the Bible in a historical critical way,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">but I could also ask questions of the scripture as questions to God, expecting to find some </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">response in the working of the Holy Spirit. I have begun to explore the Bible as the Ultimate </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Prayer Book, a book about people asking questions of God, sharing their stories as they seek </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">to figure out how they relate to the Holy Spirit, how God is moving through them. Sometimes </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">they get it wrong, but a lot of the time they find a beauty that is beyond all imagining, worth </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">sharing with the world. It is strange and sometimes very weird, but ultimately exhilarating to </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">experience the Bible in this way. It allows me to move through passages that pain in a way </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">that expresses that pain back to God and lets me sit with it, not as pain inflicted by God but </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">pain that has changed people’s experiences and perceptions of God. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">I still don’t have a fully fleshed out explanation for why God appears to do bad or petty things </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">in the Bible. But I find myself comforted in the fact that God never just leaves God’s people </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">there to suffer. There is a turn, an act of profound grace. I personally don’t buy that God </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">actually sent snakes to God’s people, but I do believe that God would send healing, even in </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">something as bizarre as a statue of a bronze snake. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">We have the Gospel of John to thank for helping us wrestle with these snakes, this weird tale </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">from the ages of wilderness wandering. Without it, the tale might be glossed over, something </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">to read with bemusement. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">But Jesus uses it as an illustration. Our gospel lesson today begins in the middle of Jesus’ </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">famous talk with Nicodemus, where Nicodemus, a leader of the Jews comes to Jesus at night,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">where Jesus engages him in a conversation about being born again. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Jesus states: “And just as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, so must the Son of </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">Man be lifted up, that whoever believes in him may have eternal life. For God so loved the </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him may not perish but </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">may have eternal life.” </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">The odd ancient story about Moses erecting a bronze statue to save people against snakes </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">is used to show how Jesus will be lifted up to save people from evil and sin. Even those who </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">constantly complain against God, never satisfied with miracles like bread from heaven and </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">water gushing forth from a rock, who moan that it was truly better in their imagined “good old </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">days”, even they are given access to complete healing and transformation. And that is truly </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">good news, because I don’t know about you, but I am much better at complaining than I am </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">about giving gratitude to God. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">We are just given one simple task, we have to look up. We have to see the weird bronze </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">snake statue against the blue sky. As we stare at the statue it becomes a cross, an ancient </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">horrific murder device that somehow is transfigured into the greatest story of redemption and </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">transformation ever told. As we stare, we have to trust that something can happen. We have </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">to put ourselves into God’s hands.</span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">It’s painful coming to this truth, coming to this light. It’s easier to live with our heads down. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">With our heads down, we don’t have to recognize how much of the world is not in our control. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">We don’t have to see each other’s pain and recognize that what harms one harms us all. We </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 12pt; white-space: pre;">don’t have to find ourselves in a web of inter-dependence, relying on not just our own selves, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 12pt; white-space: pre;">but on our neighbors, our planet, and our God. We struggle to create our own self-sufficient </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 12pt; white-space: pre;">lives, never recognizing how much connection plays a role in who has and who has not. We </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 12pt; white-space: pre;">live in a world of suffering, but we put on our blinders so we don’t see it. </span></div>
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></b>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">But when we look up, we find God taking on that suffering for us. We are opened to seeing all</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">that is wrong, which is terrifying, but we can also see where God desires the world to be. We </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">find God’s dream, a reality we call the Kingdom of God. It is a bright shining light, giving hope </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">in the face of our deepest despairs. Because despite what the world seems to tell us, God’s </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">truth is that everything can be healed. All sorrows can cease. Every tear can be dried. We just</span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">have to reconcile to one another, helping one another find healing in this broken world. It’s </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">hard. It’s pretty darn impossible if we think about it in purely human terms. There are a lot of </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">barriers I put between me and you. We have different wants and desires, different ambitions, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">but if we look at the web of connection, if we stare into the dream of the divine, we find that </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">our wants and desires are good and noble gifts. They help us create a bright colorful tapestry, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">God’s ultimate quilt of humanity, beautiful and rich. We’re supposed to be different, and we’re </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">supposed to also recognize the belovedness that each one of us holds as a child of God. We </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">have to give up our own desires for control in order to give the world to God’s control. In </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">return</span><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 12pt; white-space: pre;">, God helps us grow, parenting us into amazing roles in building the kingdom. The quilt </span><br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 12pt; white-space: pre;">grows brighter as it lives and moves and grows into fully alive people living in a fully alive world</span><span style="font-family: arial; font-size: 12pt; white-space: pre;">. </span></div>
<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">But we have to look up. We have to see the light. The light of God’s beloved child, taking on all </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">sorrow and suffering, lifted up like Moses’ bronze serpent, ready to both help us see all that is </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">wrong and also empowering us to be our full and true selves, helping to make the world right. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">We are allowed to live and grow into this selfhood, looking for the Spirit and seeking answers </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">to the hard questions. We are given death and resurrection, continually seeking to die to the </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">self that wants to look down and growing into the person unafraid to look up to a God who </span><br />
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 12pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre;">suffers with and for us that the world may have eternal life. </span></div>
</div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-37993853749150047432017-08-13T11:49:00.001-07:002017-08-13T11:49:21.876-07:00From Virginia to Iowa: A Reflection on the Violence in CharlottesvilleThe images and news coming from Charlottesville Virginia is haunting. What can you say about a bunch of angry white men carrying torches to intimidate and incite violence? The ugly head of white supremacy moves along the streets and has even inflicted murder on counter-protestors. It is chilling.<br />
<br />
But it's also really easy for me to see this as a problem way over there in Virginia, in a city that I had personally never heard the name of before, and had originally gotten confused with Charlotte, South Carolina. That whole swath of the country is someplace I've never been. I spent three years living in Atlanta, but other than spending a week once in Washington, D.C., everything on the east coast above Georgia is a mystery to me. I simply haven't been there.<br />
<br />
The places I know the best are Iowa and Nebraska. I grew up in Iowa and have been a frequent traveler to Nebraska all my life, getting my undergraduate degree there as well. I moved back to this place after seminary in Atlanta because the rich black soil called to me. The Midwest is home. But here we also have a white problem. It's more subtle than states with greater racial diversity, but it's here. It runs in our state narratives. We tell ourselves that we are just super white places. But I am mad that I never heard of the rich African American history in the city of Omaha, even when I lived in the state. I'm mad that Iowa and its cities are on lists of the worst places for black people to live, citing income disparity, incarceration rates, and the quality of education available in predominately black neighborhoods. We don't talk about it much, but we are there and we have to face the truth.<br />
<br />
When I was young, my father showed me a KKK relic. It was something he kept to remind others that the KKK was still active and still dangerous. He wanted us to know that they weren't just in our history books, they were living and breathing people who organized themselves to this day. We lived for two years in the same small town as the KKK Grand Dragon of Iowa. It's here and it's real. Now we have a variety of similar groups joining with them. They no longer wear masks, but they still carry the fire of intimidation, used to threaten anyone who stands in their way.<br />
<br />
More than anything, I think Charlottesville calls us to see what is around us. It calls us to see our disparities. It calls us to recognize the diversity we, especially those of us in predominately white states, often ignore. It calls us to recognize real threats, real hate groups, living among us. It calls us to be real.<br />
<br />
It's hard to sit with this discomfort. We want to sugar-coat it or say that it's happening over there instead of right here as well. But I have learned that the only way to resurrection, to total transformation of the self, is to go through crucifixion moments. Right now, that's what I think we need more than ever. We need to allow this to crucify our nation and our states. We need to lament what is happening, to mourn, to weep, to sit in the ash heaps. Only then do I believe that something amazing can happen. I believe that the Holy Spirit can sweep through us and bring an utter transformation of heart, of soul, of community. I believe we can turn things around. I believe that the torches of intimidation can be vanquished and the fires of love can burn so deeply that we can transform unjust systems. And as someone who has pussy-footed around these issues, who has felt lost in trying to figure it all out, who and can't stand my own internal racism that pokes its head through my consciousness, I believe that even someone like me can help and make a difference for those around them. I believe that crucifixion can bring even me to resurrection, and if it can bring me there, I believe it can bring our communities, our states, and our nation there too. The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-32968763527581317862017-07-03T20:55:00.004-07:002017-07-03T20:55:50.728-07:00The Discipline of PovertyI have been thinking a lot over the past two years about poverty. Now, I must say that we are not deeply impoverished. We have pets. We rent a house. We have two cars. We have enough money to get through the month. But as a whole, that's where our money ends. And for nine months after we first moved to Des Moines, it didn't even make it that far. I am lucky to have amazingly supportive parents who have the means to give to us financially. My middle class upbringing saved us from some hard times and hard decisions. I've been given space until I could become a big budget person, trying to eek out all the money we can and reduce wasteful spending. I've also become the guy who can't figure out what things we can do for fun because I simply don't want to spend the funds or the money doesn't exist. I'm learning balance. But I'm also learning about the discipline of poverty.<br />
<br />
The discipline of poverty is simply this: learning to embrace yourself as a child of the divine even when there isn't much to your name. And that's hard. Even before the myth of the self-made man and the idea that everyone somehow has bootstraps to pull themselves up by, there has always been a fear of the impoverished. I think it's hard for us to face how fragile we are, how easily everything could be taken away. If we didn't have support, if we didn't have a community that gave to us, we would not be where we are today. And those without support, when hard times hit, they aren't able to stay where they are. We tend to try to analyze what made their times hard. We chide them for taking lower paying jobs, for not spending more time at work. We demonize mental health crises and substance abuse problems. We try to make them "not us". But the more I learn the discipline of poverty, the more I find the fabric of life weaving us all together, even when I'd much rather not be "like them". In those moments, I find Jesus the itinerant preacher, moving from place to place, picking heads of wheat from the fields with his disciples as they head along their journey, always finding a new home to eat meals in. I begin to see this discipline in practice. They lived into poverty, not because there is something ultimately holy about not having or barely having enough, but because they sought to rely on community. We as well need to ask what it looks like to rely on community, because it is only by the strength of love given by those around us that we are able to survive. There is no other way. <br />
<br />
I'm still not good at this discipline. I'd much rather not live it. Often I find our world getting smaller as we simply choose to stay home instead of going out. There are a number of reasons besides our budget why you often won't see us away from home that much (Did I mention the pets?) but I've also found ways to share in community that are beautiful. I've seen people coming together to support one another, to do meaningful things together with very little money being exchanged at all. I've found flexible ways to do what I desire. I've found community lifting up one another.<br />
<br />
And as I think about the future of the Church, the future of ministry and life together, I wonder if this discipline is what parishes are beginning to learn. There are always the big donors in the parish, but more and more, many in the community are being stretched. They are being drawn into lower classes and wondering if they are doing something wrong in their lives. It's hard to be cash poor and not feel guilty about it. I struggle with that. Communities struggle with that. Churches struggle with that. But what if we leaned into this discipline? What could we learn as we focus more on community than budget? It would completely break apart current models of full time ministers and staff, tearing apart church pension funds and the structures of denominations themselves. It's a really scary prospect and there's a lot to lose. We might start to feel really insular and stay home a lot. We may not know exactly how to find balance. We may decide not to do anything fun or exciting because we don't want to spend the money or there simply isn't money in the coffers. We may look at the homeless in our midst and wonder if we will soon be without homes too. But in the midst of the scary and threatening things, the kind of stuff that keeps you up at night and fuels anxiety, there is a man moving through the fields with his motley crew. Sometimes he calms storms, sometimes he makes an abundant feast with simple loaves and fishes. Always he relies on the gifts of the people around him, entrusting himself to community. He casts his gaze towards the poor, the outcast, those whom appear to be left behind by their communities, and he heals, he restores, he brings them into relationship with those around them. He shows us that community is ultimately what we need, not money in the bank. He loves us into better ways of being together. <br />
<br />
<i><span class="text Matt-6-25"><span class="woj">“Therefore,
I say to you, don’t worry about your life, what you’ll eat or what
you’ll drink, or about your body, what you’ll wear. Isn’t life more than
food and the body more than clothes?</span></span> <span class="text Matt-6-26" id="en-CEB-23308"><sup class="versenum"> </sup><span class="woj">Look
at the birds in the sky. They don’t sow seed or harvest grain or gather
crops into barns. Yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Aren’t you worth
much more than they are?</span></span><span class="text Matt-6-27" id="en-CEB-23309"><sup class="versenum"> </sup><span class="woj">Who among you by worrying can add a single moment to your life?</span></span> <span class="text Matt-6-28" id="en-CEB-23310"><span class="woj">And
why do you worry about clothes? Notice how the lilies in the field
grow. They don’t wear themselves out with work, and they don’t spin
cloth.</span></span> <span class="text Matt-6-29" id="en-CEB-23311"><span class="woj">But I say to you that even Solomon in all of his splendor wasn’t dressed like one of these.</span></span> <span class="text Matt-6-30" id="en-CEB-23312"><span class="woj">If
God dresses grass in the field so beautifully, even though it’s alive
today and tomorrow it’s thrown into the furnace, won’t God do much more
for you, you people of weak faith?</span></span> <span class="text Matt-6-31" id="en-CEB-23313"><span class="woj">Therefore, don’t worry and say, ‘What are we going to eat?’ or ‘What are we going to drink?’ or ‘What are we going to wear?’</span></span> <span class="text Matt-6-32" id="en-CEB-23314"><sup class="versenum"> </sup><span class="woj">Gentiles long for all these things. Your heavenly Father knows that you need them.</span></span> <span class="text Matt-6-33" id="en-CEB-23315"><sup class="versenum"> </sup><span class="woj">Instead, desire first and foremost God’s kingdom and God’s righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.</span></span> <span class="text Matt-6-34" id="en-CEB-23316"><span class="woj">Therefore, stop worrying about tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. </span></span></i><span class="text Matt-6-34" id="en-CEB-23316"><span class="woj">Matthew 6:25-34, CEB </span></span><br />
<br />The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-67150740744246977022017-02-11T19:41:00.000-08:002017-02-11T19:41:35.291-08:00I Come For the Eucharist<i>This is a piece I wrote after my first meeting with a spiritual director, where he saw me light up about the Eucharist. It was something I promptly wrote, sent in for the church newsletter, and then set aside. It wasn't until this week, in conversation with people who have done and explored ministry development teams, that raise up local people for ordination into different roles in the community, and those who don't have weekly access to the sacrament, that I realized how vital it is to bring access to the Eucharist for everyone, regardless of their ability to hire clergy. It brought me back to this piece, which reappeared to me in the church newsletter that was delivered to my door today. This is the reason why I believe Eucharist matters. This is why I consider myself to be Anglo-Catholic, but also am comfortable doing Eucharist in what some may deem a "low church" way, in a bar, park or wherever. Because in the end, I love smells and bells, I love ritual, and order, but it all pales in comparison with the Eucharist. </i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I grew up in a tradition where we had communion once a
month. Some months it was powerful, some months it was perfunctory, but every
month, I tried to make it. I noticed as I grew up, I felt when I had missed
communion Sunday. It mattered. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As I considered ministry, I found myself going to multiple
churches on the weekend. I was searching for something. I was connected to a
community, but I also felt an absence. And as I entered seminary, I realized
what it was. I was searching for Eucharist. I started having it multiple times
a week, and as I became Episcopalian I found joy in having it as part of my Sunday
morning worship. Some Sundays I’m tired, I’m not feeling particularly sociable,
I’d really like one more jolt of caffeine, but I come. I come for this. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Eucharist to me is more than a prayer, bread, and wine.
In it, Jesus dwells among us. Jesus becomes incarnate, made flesh, in us. The
bread and wine take on the Spirit, and the Spirit is ingested, moving
throughout our bodies, bringing nourishment and life. Our cells are given a
jolt of Spirit. We are literally taking on a new life. It doesn’t come all at
once. It comes little by little, piece by piece. Week by week we get just a
little bit more. We, the body of Christ, take sustenance from Jesus’ body,
becoming like him. <o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I also find that as we, who are a diverse group of many
people, take in the one body, we all become interconnected, into one body. I
can no longer hold grudges and divisiveness in my heart against one of you. We
all share in Christ. Similarly, I can’t hold hatred against any Christian. We
are all connected. And as the circles of connectedness, of people who are all
one in this body, are drawn wider, from the service, to the congregation, to
the diocese, to the nation, to the world, I find that being part of this
interconnected and living Christ, I cannot find hatred for people of other
religions and no religion. I can’t find hatred at all. We all share in a big,
beautiful, diverse body. Some do not believe in Christ, some don’t take the
Eucharist, but we all eat. We all drink. We all require nourishment. While the
Eucharist is particularly holy, blessed elements that bring the divine Christ,
all food sustains life. All food allows individual spirits to be uplifted. All
food connects us. And so, the simple table, the wafer, the wine, brings this
cosmic interconnectedness in which I can only find love and care for those
around me. And so I come. I take in the Spirit, and I find life anew with all
of creation. I find myself drawn deeper into the love that is without
boundaries. Amen. <o:p></o:p></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-17292096265214168442016-12-11T06:39:00.002-08:002016-12-11T06:39:44.889-08:00Delving into the StoryThe other day I found myself at a reception for an ordination in the church basement. And I gravitated, as I often do towards the clergy. The bishop and his wife joined us. During the conversation, his wife, a talented actress and dancer, asked me about my discernment. I shared a bit about my team and my mix of joy and frustration about taking a long time to process my call and my journey towards who knows what kind of ministry (my discernment team members know my frustration and joy well, and I consider it to be a holy mix, ripe for the Spirit). And after I had given my little bit, she said, "What I meant was that I'm the only one at this table who is not clergy minded." And I agreed and there was an all together too brief conversation before I left. <div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Today, I am going to go see her in her element, as a theater minded individual, someone who finds her spot comfortably on the stage, and I've been thinking about this interaction between theater and the Church, especially because she is not the only amazingly talented performer married to a bishop that I know. And it is the interaction between performer and cleric that interests me. I think there is something deep there. At the heart of it, they are both individuals invested in sharing stories. They both have a desire, a passion for delving into stories, for becoming part of the story. The actress literally takes on her character, leaving herself behind as she embodies a key part of the play. The clergy person delves into the story of Christ, and embodies to the best of their ability the character of Christ. The actress uplifts people by helping people become engrossed in a tale that can shape their perspective. The clergy person tries to do the same, helping people embody Christ in their lives. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
To try to probe too deep into the similarities between acting and clergy work would cheapen both, but their investment in stories is something to hold onto and ponder. Because ultimately, our God's nature is shared to us in story. We learn who we were created to be through a story of God calling creation good. We learn about what lengths God is willing to go for us through the story of the Moses leading the people out of Israel and in the crucifixion of Christ. We find new life through resurrection tales, through manna in the wilderness and Mary Magdalene discovering that the man who she thought was the gardener was actually the risen Lord. We find the pull towards newness of life, towards a life that truly is life, through the repentance of David and the scales falling off Paul's eyes. We learn Christ through sharing in the story, through being enveloped in the story.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
And this season, we ponder the biggest story. The story of Christmas is not any more about Jesus' birthday than it is about Santa Claus. It's about incarnation, about God choosing to be among us, to be with us in a new and radical way. In a human way. And that humanity came to the earth in the deepest of poverty. He was not a rich prince, not a middle class white American. He was someone who had no control over his government, who ultimately killed him when he threatened their authority. He was born to a couple who couldn't even find a room at a hotel for him to be born. He was born to parents who had to flee to another country, become refugees, to keep him safe so he could grow up. And his mother's song at the proclamation of his upcoming birth shares God's deepest desires for humanity. God looks on us with favor and calls us blessed. God shows mercy and justice, and casts down those who are too powerful, not through military intervention, but through a way that always holds those whom the powerful oppress in their view, calling them to do better. God fills the hungry and helps them, through a multiplicity of ways that all require us. God remembers the promise made to us, that we would be God's and God would be with us. Jesus is the ultimate fulfillment of this promise and hope. And if we, as Christians, little Christs, start living into this story, taking it on, acting it out, we find our world changed. We find that Christ comes again and again, not as one particular human, but as God among us. That is the Christmas story. It is not about a baby, it is about God coming among us in a new and radical way. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
May we become like the actress, embodying this key incarnated character. May we become like the clergy person, not just taking Christ on for a time, but working every day to try to live into this character in our own unique ways, sharing our particular gifts. May we ever be in awe of this story, this sacred scripture, written not to share facts but to give our lives a story that is truer than truth. Amen.</div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-37651196187737179412016-05-06T19:48:00.001-07:002016-05-06T19:48:47.378-07:00Dear United Methodist Siblings: A Letter as You Head to General ConferenceDear United Methodist Siblings,<br />
<br />
It feels strange for me to write to you, because I am not one of you anymore, but I have come to the conclusion that I will always be connected to you. Through my family, my work, and my history, we will always be linked. I will always find myself talking with someone about your politics, your structures, and your struggles. We are still siblings.<br />
<br />
And as you move into this time, you are starting to talk a lot about a deep part of me, my queer identity, part of what made it hard for me to be one of you, part of why I found myself walking away. But I am not writing to tell you to change your policies. I agree that would be fantastic, but more than that, I am writing asking you to not draw battle lines. I remember observing annual conferences and being a part of them, and I liked it until the sexuality battle lines were drawn, because you have been talking about this since before I can remember. One person stands up and asks for inclusion, another stands up and angrily quotes Bible verses, and it gets heated from there. People walk away certain that they were right and stood up for their beliefs and nothing changes. The trenches just get dug a little deeper for the next year when you will have the conversation all over again, and the next year, and the next year. <br />
<br />
United Methodist friends, I have felt for a long time like you just keep digging your trenches, drawing your battle lines, firm in your rightness. And I do have a side, I do have a strongly held belief about this too. But I'm convinced that Jesus did not draw battle lines. He got into heated conversations, but he still shared meals with everyone, Pharisee, Samaritan, whomever. He was able to hold his deep beliefs and reach out and share life with those whom he did not agree with. He didn't build trenches. And it's hard when someone else has a battle line and you want to cross it in love. There's a lot of uncertainty in how to do that. But more than anything, that's what I want General Conference to be for you. That's what I pray you experience. And some will walk away with their trenches dug. No matter what happens, your denomination will lose members after this Conference. It's inevitable. But my prayer is for you that if you attend, you are able to find someone you disagree with readily and build a relationship with them. I pray that you may truly relish in the diversity of beliefs and opinions within your denomination, the wide diversity of people and practices. And as you share in the body and blood of our Lord, may the Holy Spirit envelop your gathering and lead you into a new life together. Amen.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-79941967503930370272016-05-03T05:10:00.001-07:002016-05-03T05:12:25.428-07:00"Do You Want to Be Made Well?" A Reflection by the Pool of Beth-ZathaPreached at Trinity Episcopal Church, Iowa City on May 1, 2016<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Gospel text: John 5:1-9</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<i>When Jesus saw him lying there and knew that he had been there a long
time, he said to him, “Do you want to be made well?<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Take a moment to imagine the turmoil
of this man at the pool of Beth-zatha. Everyday this man crawls toward the pool
that has the power to heal him, only to be blocked, day after day, week after
week, year after year. For 38 years this man crawled toward the pool, only to
be pushed aside before he could touch the water that promised new life, living
in torment. Every day, he hoped and believed that something would happen, that
he would make it. That he would be healed. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> Then Jesus
enters the scene and asks, “Do you want to be made well?” The man vents to
Jesus. Of course he wants to be made well. His whole life has been consumed by
this one task. Each day he works his way toward new life, and each day he is
thwarted. There appears to be no release, no end to this suffering. But Jesus
sets him free. Jesus allows him to move on. No longer condemned to this endless
loop of crawling toward this pool, of being pushed aside and having to start
all over again, this man is free to start a new life. He can walk away from
where he had been and begin life again. His life was transformed by the power
of Christ. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> Many of us fall
into the trap of thinking that this man’s burden, this man’s struggle was being
unable to walk. He couldn’t do it before Jesus came on the scene and he could
after Jesus talked with him. I think it is a very able bodied way of thinking,
one that assumes that there is a correct type of body and an incorrect one. And
I’m not convinced that there is a right or wrong type of body, but there are
certainly societal expectations and condemnations attached to each type. This
man appears to be condemned by his society for inhabiting his body. He either
doesn’t have any family or friends, or he isn’t connected to them. Because he
doesn’t have anyone to help him, he has been living this life, crawling toward
a pool that he believes contains everything he needs, only to be pushed aside
by those who are connected, those who have resources, those who have people who
accept them. If he can reach it, he gains resources, not least of which is the
ability to walk and gain better means of supporting himself. Without the use of
his legs, he will continue to be pushed aside, with the use of his legs, he has
a means to support and take care of himself. He has a better place in this
world. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> His world is
much like our own. We think of some bodies as inherently better than others. We
give them deference and honor. White able bodied cis men are given the
most deference and honor. They have the “right” body, the archetypical body
that all others are compared to. But is there a right body, or are there just
more societally acceptable bodies? Does Jesus heal his legs to give him the
right body, or does Jesus heal his legs to help him leave a place of torment
and find new and better ways of interacting with the world? I believe this is
the way that Jesus truly sets him free. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> Jesus finds
this man, in a sea of people trying to reach this pool, a large crowd that has
the ability to constantly push this man back to his starting point, Jesus sees
him. Jesus calls out to him. Jesus sets him free. His societal condemnation,
his disconnectedness, his isolation was recognized, and Jesus brings him a new
hope and a new sense of connection. Feelings of condemnation are turned into
joy and suddenly there is someone who actually sees and cares about him. He has
been given a new life. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> Friends,
every day our society puts people into situations similar to this man. Those
who hit hard times, but have connections tend to do okay. Those without
resources feel condemned to live lives of relative isolation and condemnation.
A person moves to a city trying to build better life and instead finds
themselves alone and homeless. Another finds that illness has stripped them of
their connections as healthcare both depletes them of time and money. Someone
comes out to their family and friends, only to find themselves losing them all.
<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> And we are
called to notice. We are called to care. But in doing so, we need to ask
ourselves what our definition of wellness is. What does it mean to be made
whole? What does resurrection look like in the face of crucifixion? These are
the questions that keep me engaged with the Gospel. This is the challenge of
the Christian life. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> Within the challenge, we aren’t called to get it all right. I
don’t know what wellness or wholeness looks like in every situation. I’m not
always sure what resurrection means. But I know when I have felt resurrection
power. I have felt resurrection power learning more about my beautifully
diverse trans community, fighting alongside others for things that many take
for granted, like being able to go to the bathroom when you need to, and being
able to find a job. It’s in community gatherings and Facebook communities where
people can ask questions and support each other throughout their journeys,
coming together to help people pay for surgeries, answering questions about
shots and pills, and it’s also in accepting that some people need gender
affirming medical help and others don’t. We come together as community and we
share with each other and we allow ourselves to grow, asking each other, “How
can I help you feel well and whole? What does wellness look like for you?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> I find
resurrection power in being able to help people grow into allies, supporting
each other and learning from one another. One of my favorite people who is
still learning how to be an ally is my friend Jerry. Jerry is a navy veteran,
and went to get his Master of Theology degree after retirement. For the first
two years of my Master’s program, Jerry was a consistent presence in my life.
After hearing that I was transgender, he told me that he supported me and was
always curious about how things were going in my life. I had come out as
transgender my last semester of undergrad and went directly to seminary, so it
was an interesting journey for all of us. He was curious about my experiences
as I began taking testosterone after my first semester and he paid more
attention to news about people in the Trans community. Our usual conversations went something like
this: Jerry would come up to me while I was studying or after chapel and would
say, “I have been thinking about you recently” and then ask a question that was
either off the wall or slightly inappropriate. One time he very seriously told
me about a story he had heard about a man who had become a woman in his 70’s.
(His words, not mine), and asked, “Why would he do that? Couldn’t he just be
him?” And I had to tell Jerry, “Maybe for the first time, she was just being
herself.” And I thought of the torment, the anxiety, the fear, that comes with
trying to live day after day, month after month, year after year, as someone
you aren’t comfortable being. Of hearing the wrong pronouns, of dreaming of
wearing certain clothing, but feeling too afraid. And this woman broke free
from the fear and embraced herself after over 70 years. I can see Jesus walking
up to her as she inched toward that pool of wholeness every day only to be
pushed back by others or herself, and finally she hears the question, “Do you
want to be made well?” And she is
granted permission to be herself, to strip off the mask of manhood and embrace
the person inside. She found herself transformed into her truest self. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;"> Friends, Christ has the power to transform us
all. We can all become whole people, living examples of resurrection power.
Christ transformed my life by allowing me to come out as a transgender person,
finding wholeness through this life changing journey. Christ transformed Jerry
through his curiosity and willingness to learn about different ways of being
human in this world. Christ transformed
the man at the well’s life by allowing him to step away from his daily
struggle, from the all-consuming journey toward a pool he could not get to,
releasing him from his burden. How is
Christ transforming you? What resurrection stories do you have to tell to the
world? How is Christ using resurrection power through this community, bringing
transformation to the world? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 200%;">Let us pray: Christ, you have called
us to not only be a community that follows you, but to be people who take your
body into our body, to become wholly yours, people who are made well and
transformed by your resurrection power. Lord, help us to see where resurrection
needs to happen in our lives and in the world. Call us into the places of crucifixion. And give us your strength to
step through those burdens and struggles, those fears and real persecutions that
hold us back from wholeness into new life. Amen. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-8730879147207964052016-03-25T17:11:00.000-07:002016-03-25T17:11:12.005-07:00An Invitation to Holy SaturdayHoly Saturday is the odd child of Holy Week. We have washed feet, retold the story of the institution of the Eucharist, followed Jesus into the Garden of Gethsemane, heard the cries of "Crucify Him!" and marked with silence his death on the cross. And then we walk away, with Jesus in the tomb.<br />
<br />
We don't really know what to do with this day, this in-between time after Good Friday and before we celebrate the resurrection. Many of us fill the gap day by jumping the gun on Easter, having egg hunts and parties. At the parish, the building is alive in the scurry of preparation. Everything is cleaned and polished, and what feels like millions of lilies descend upon the place in great anticipation of what is to come. Nobody tries to think about a dead body in a borrowed tomb, because we know the rest of the story.<br />
<br />
Holy Saturday mimics the day after a funeral, when everybody is still in town, but nobody knows quite what to do with themselves. The pain of death is still fresh, and the air of loss permeates all that you do. There is an empty space, both in the heart, and in the physical space. Their chair is empty, their favorite mug goes unused. You want to do something and you want to do nothing at the same time. There is no established routine to help you through it. It's hard to let it be.<br />
<br />
But I think that discomfort, that sense of emptiness and loss is an important part of Holy Week. Year after year we are reminded of that disconnect, that gap when Jesus was in a tomb and the world had crucified the greatest gift it had ever been given. It is a time to grieve for the world, who is in so much pain and turmoil. It is a time to feel the loss of lives to violence and apathy. It is hard to sit with it. You want to do something and nothing at the same time. There appears to be nothing to help you through it and it's hard to just let it be, to let yourself actually feel it. You'd rather skip to the resurrection, to celebrating life, but I think there is power in being able to sit with death. It cannot harm you, it has been conquered, but it can change you.<br />
<br />
Maybe sitting with Christ's death, you will find a new focus for your life. Maybe you will discover your apathy melting away and a call to new ministry and new life in Christ, ready to battle those things which cause so much death in the world. I invite you to take your time, to not rush through the tomb to get to the resurrection. Let it be. Invite it to shape you.<br />
<br />
A blessed Holy Saturday to you and yours. The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-43706076111030286352016-02-11T05:33:00.003-08:002016-02-11T05:33:52.560-08:00Ashes at the Pizza Place: Breaking Bread<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv7Bjqn1Zxern6i54z1WXoR2WNshO1uun3aGvCV0gkw_npGw5rxyml_yUQJ0DYHseYt6rtDYtPrbfRoUqBwBVddzeTd4OWg_cJCcv2FQMpD5BOcaUaMbxcascg52T4CVlqwoyrdjwvLQWZ/s1600/Breaking+Bread.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="143" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv7Bjqn1Zxern6i54z1WXoR2WNshO1uun3aGvCV0gkw_npGw5rxyml_yUQJ0DYHseYt6rtDYtPrbfRoUqBwBVddzeTd4OWg_cJCcv2FQMpD5BOcaUaMbxcascg52T4CVlqwoyrdjwvLQWZ/s320/Breaking+Bread.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Breaking Bread is a ministry that always surprises me. It began as a conversation about how my friend does beer & hymns and the possibilities of doing church in a bar. The image I had of my friend's ministry somehow being morphed into a ministry of The Episcopal Diocese of Iowa never happened. Our first location didn't allow music and I don't think we will ever have a set up like my friend has in Atlanta. She has a praise team and a bar that regularly hosts local bands. We have a small group of people who want to experience community and communion outside of church walls.<br />
<br />
In our first gathering, we found that the reason we were there had nothing to do with trying to be edgy or provocative. We were there because there were people who needed to connect, both with each other, and with Jesus. We provided that space, that place for community in a location that didn't have a steeple and pews. Most of those who gather for Breaking Bread have a church home, some don't. All are looking for Jesus to be revealed in new ways, and sometimes a location change helps.<br />
<br />
And last night we gathered in a cramped room at a small pizza place. A place of significance, as Chef D has his own feeding ministry, feeding those who are homeless and in need, inspired by his own faith in Christ. Twenty-two people contemplating that they are dust. There were a couple of older people, a small band of college students, and a larger group of adults with young children. Looking for connection. Seeking Christ in new ways. Interspersed in the Ash Wednesday liturgy was talking and eating, taking care of little ones and getting drink refills. It wasn't a quiet service, but it was a holy service. When some staff came to receive ashes, I knew why we were there. When a young child handed communion bread to her friend as they played on the floor, I knew why we were there. We were there to find the sacred in the everyday, the extraordinary in the mundane. And as we asked Christ to open our eyes, I saw glimpses of the kingdom. It came simply in the breaking of the bread and the prayers. <br />
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-73350405145108467562015-12-07T20:14:00.000-08:002015-12-07T21:05:44.819-08:00Advent with the VAWe have entered an "in sickness" time of our marriage and are working toward new health. Jamie went into the VA early the Monday morning after Christ the King Sunday. My Advent began with what has become my new regular routine, going to work, taking care of the animals, trying to keep the house in order, and visiting Jamie at the VA. He went in because his meds weren't working anymore and his depression and PTSD were getting too hard to handle.He has begun the process of rebirth as we wait for a new birth of the Messiah into our lives and the world.<br />
<br />
Jamie has begun an 8 week inpatient program to help him with his struggle. Most nights you can find me at the VA with him, playing cards and talking with the guys. My Advent experience is changed by his journey. And as I sit at the VA, with veterans who are both brave and broken, strong and weak, working through those things which hold them back in the world, I find the call of the Prince of Peace. My soul becomes reckless with the call for peace. The words of the hymn, "Comfort, Comfort Ye My People" ring out in my soul:<br />
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">"Comfort, comfort ye My people,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">Speak ye peace, thus saith our God;</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">Comfort those who sit in darkness,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">Mourning ’neath their sorrow’s load;</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">Speak ye to Jerusalem</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">Of the peace that waits for them;</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">Tell her that her sins I cover,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">And her warfare now is over."</span><br />
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">And I wonder when our warfare with each other will end. Because you can't leave the VA without feeling </span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">both profoundly honored to be with those who risked their lives for their country and profoundly </span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">saddened that many are still at war, not in another country, but in their very beings. Their life paths have </span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">been forever altered by the actions of our government. They carry new diagnoses and conditions because of </span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">where they were sent and what they did. And I wonder how we speak peace to the veteran's soul? What is the</span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;">best way to comfort these, God's people, mourning 'neath their sorrow's load? When is their warfare over?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify; white-space: nowrap;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: white; white-space: nowrap;">The next time those in the government call for war, I invite you into the halls of the VA.<br />Watch, listen. Ask if we have to go to war or if there is another way.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: white; white-space: nowrap;">And hear God's call, "Comfort, Comfort Ye My People."</span></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-31773633160026550282015-05-24T19:32:00.000-07:002015-05-24T19:32:12.138-07:00The Spirit of Pentecost<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sermon Preached at Church of the Incarnation, Atlanta</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Texts:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ezekiel 37:1-4</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Acts 2:1-21</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">John 15:26-27, 16:4b-15</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In today’s world, I wonder if Pentecost needs a new
interpretation. It is easy to get swept
up in the beautiful imagery, of tongues of fire landing on the disciples’
heads’, of people hearing the Gospel message in their own native language, but
I think it gets harder when we try to interpret what it means for us today, how
it can change our lives. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> The
disciples’ experiences are such a holy mystery to me. They were all together,
fifty days after the Passover, after the death and resurrection of Christ,
celebrating a small religious festival when suddenly there was the sound of a
great violent wind, like a tornado, and it filled their entire house. All of a
sudden flames appeared above their heads. They were filled with the Holy Spirit
and were speaking languages they had never spoken before in their lives. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> They
went outside, and a large crowd gathered around them, Jews from all nations,
and the Gospel was shared with them in their own language. I imagine that it
was a chaotic scene, each disciple speaking at the same time, yet every person
in the crowd heard their own language, and heard the message that was being
shared. It was a prophetic moment. It was a moment when the Spirit broke into
human existence, human life, and shared the truth of this world that is truer
than our existence. It spoke of the existence of the mysterious triune God and
the Christ who was both scandalously human and divine. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Can
you imagine if that were to happen today? Can you imagine if this entire
building was suddenly filled with the sound of gale force winds, flames danced
upon everyone’s heads, and everybody began speaking the multitude of languages
found in Atlanta? What would you say? What would you think? I can’t fault the
people who thought the disciples were drunk. There would be no earthly
explanation for what was happening. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> This
radical demonstration of the Holy Spirit would change the world as we knew it.
It certainly changed the world in the disciples’ time. Yet we would be at fault
if we did not think that displays of the Holy Spirit do not happen today. What
once came with wind and flame to the apostles has been passed onto us as children
of God. This is the Spirit of truth, of prophecy. It has the power to
completely reconfigure our lives. When we feel like we are a pile of dry bones,
it can speak sinews and flesh into our lives. It can call out “Live!” and bring
us life. It is the Spirit that can take fishermen from Galilee and change the
course of human history. It is the Spirit that took a persecutor and turned him
into the greatest evangelist the world has ever known. It is the Spirit that
called out to the saints, turning ordinary humans into extraordinary examples
of faithful living. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> This
is the Spirit that calls to us today. The Spirit that calls us to prophesy. It
calls us to listen to what God is saying to our lives, listening in our hearts
to the voice of the divine. It calls us to a relationship so deep that it
completely changes who we are and transforms our community. It changes how we
see the world, not as a world that can be explained solely through scientific
fact, through economics and human nature, but as a world that is wholly God’s,
something made by God to flourish and live. It calls us to declare that because
God cared so much to send a Messiah, we must care so much that we dare to see
the call of this Messiah in every living being. It invites us to see visions
and dream dreams of a new and better world, a heavenly kingdom, a New
Jerusalem. It challenges a world that sees others as less than, seeking rather
to respect the dignity of every human being. We are called to come out of the
selfish nature of our lives into the selfless nature of Christ, not by lowering
self-esteem, but by building us up into holy people, people who can speak the
truth of God’s love into the world. We are called not just to be good people,
but to be holy people, people who live in deep relationship with the divine,
who can feel the tongues of flame upon our own heads. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> So
who are you called to speak to? What are you called to in your own life? What
is this community called to be? These are the questions the Spirit leads us
into. They are answered in visions and dreams and longings for something new.
The desire for difference, for change and growth, is the beginning of what can
become the rushing winds of our own lives. It can lead us into greater study,
greater prayer, greater visions and dreams. Slowly our dry bones can grow flesh
as we find our relationship linked to this amazing Spirit. We can find it
within prayer and prophecy, silence and deep conversation. As we begin to dream
and vision what we are called to do and be, we can feel the Spirit rush in,
speaking life into our flesh and lives. We can go out in confidence knowing
that the Spirit has called us and is leading the way. It is leading us to
inhabit those things that have been our deepest longings. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This
Spirit comes today to completely change the history of the world. It comes to
us, not in wind and fire, but bread and wine. It comes in and radically alters
simple food into something holy. It comes to nourish and sustain us, to lead us
in the way that is truth and life. Let it come and bring a vision into your
being. Let yourself be taken over, allowing yourself to be transformed week
after week, Eucharist after Eucharist, by these Spirit infused elements into a
person, into a community that is fully alive, in tune with the divine, living
out your call in this world. Let us come to the table today seeking this Spirit
given to us at Pentecost.</span></span></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-43103907831415785082015-04-28T14:37:00.003-07:002015-04-28T14:37:15.945-07:00Searching for Easter in Baltimore and NepalTwo major events have occurred almost simultaneously over the past week. Thousands have been injured or died in Nepal as the result of earthquakes and in Baltimore, thousands have risen in protest against a police force that can take a black man into custody and then mysteriously sever his spine and cause his death. In the midst of questions surrounding the senseless deaths of people of color, one can only wonder where Christ is in the midst of all this.<br />
<br />
These events can only be seen as crucifixion events, Good Fridays, in my mind. This does not make the victims Christ, but rather is a recognition that Christ is in these events alongside those who suffer, suffering with them. When Freddie Gray died, when countless other individuals died under suspicious circumstances at the hands of the authorities that were supposed to protect them, Christ was alongside them, crucified. When natural disaster occur and death tolls rise, Christ is alongside them, crucified.<br />
<br />
But we know that crucifixion does not have the last say. We know that after the destruction and the horror, after the senseless death and betrayal of trust, after the crucifixion and death of even a Savior, life can be reborn. Resurrection can come. Things can be made new.<br />
<br />
But what does that look like? How can we find it in the events of this week? What does it mean to believe in the power of Easter today?<br />
<br />
I believe it means learning how to mourn and grieve as a worldwide community. It means mourning humans who were lost when structures collapsed. These structures are both literal buildings and structures of government that were supposed to protect and serve. It means allowing a space for profound grieving, a space where we can feel the full weight of loss. We often want to leave Good Friday and dive directly into Easter, but we all need space for mourning and grief. Jesus didn't rise the next day, and we need not jump immediately to rebuilding and renewal. Sometimes we just need time to cry. Funerals and protests, burials and responses to loss are part of what it means to be an Easter people.<br />
<br />
I believe it means looking through and beyond looting and riots. It means looking at the underlying reasons for protest and working for just resolution. It means rebuilding structures in a way that provides strength against the forces of nature and providing aid to those who feel the deepest loss. Governments can change. Accountability can happen. Nations can be strengthened. Grief can be transformed into renewal of spirit. It is not easy. In fact, it's completely unnatural. Without God, without a Savior that has overcome death, we could never overcome these losses. But we have a force that is stronger than anything that the world could throw its way. It is the force of divine love working to transform all things, a force that can face death and resurrect life.<br />
<br />
As we mourn, as we protest, let us also lift up our voices to the God who has resurrection power. For through God, our Good Fridays can become Easters.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-3616339560221711672015-03-04T18:48:00.000-08:002015-03-04T19:38:27.582-08:00To those who say, "I don't really trust organized religion. It's done a lot of bad things"Last night I heard this phrase again. "I don't really trust organized religion. It's done a lot of bad things." And I listened to a clergy person talk about fundamentalism, which while relevant to the issue, didn't really address it. Because it wasn't just fundamentalism that this person was critiquing. This person was addressing religion as a universal concept. And the comment didn't come from someone who had a lot of personal experience with fundamentalist traditions, this came from somebody raised Episcopalian.<br />
<br />
This comment is similar to many comments that I've heard recently, critiques of religion and more specifically of the Church, as many who I hear this from are nominal or former Christians or have mostly interacted with Christians. If you are one of these people, this letter is for you.<br />
<br />
Dear Person who feels the pain of religious institutions,<br />
<br />
I get it. I really do. People have hurt many in the name of religion. There were the crusades, holy wars, bickering, and battles all done over religious matters. And now today we have groups of terrorists claiming a form of Islam as their reason for destruction. In the United States, people are dying from religion in subtler ways. Children are being kicked out of religious homes for being LGBTQ. Several teenagers have recently committed suicide because their parents refused to believe that God makes some people transgender. People have died and are dying because of religious matters and organized religion.<br />
<br />
I can't sugar coat what has happened or what is happening and I can't make it all feel okay. There is pain around the edges of every religious tradition, organization, and institution. I feel it, I see it. I know that not everything's okay.<br />
<br />
But I have seen the power for good that comes from organized religion. I have seen groups mobilize to save lives, I have seen the hungry fed and the naked clothed. I have witnessed transformations that are remarkable. Most of them aren't big and flashy, they don't often make the headline news, though sometimes they do. But most importantly they happen. Look around you. Look at what the institutions in your town or city are doing for those around them. It may not be much, but it's happening. When those small efforts are combined with other people's efforts, amazing things happen. Many religious people are absolutely committed to changing the world, one person, one social issue at a time. Sometimes they are Martin Luther King Jr. and sometimes they are Joy, who works at a clothing closet for the homeless. They work diligently, insisting on affirming the dignity of every human life.<br />
<br />
With the ability to do great good comes the ability to do great evil. You see both in any organized religion. When evil things happen they can be incredibly painful. When good things happen, there is truly hope for the reformation of the world. People begin to be able to open their imaginations to all the possibilities of what the world could look like. There is inspiration that can only be divinely given. Lives are given over to divinity that is greater than anything imaginable and people begin to work to transform this world from the inside out.<br />
<br />
Institutional and organized religion help people imagine and live out a divinely given communal identity. They are grand experiments, workshops for people to learn how to frame their lives around the identity the divine calls us to. Sometimes the people in these experimental communities falter. Sometimes these communities wrap around ideas that close them off from people they are called to care for. Sometimes they work. Enough of these communities have transformed enough lives that they continue to flourish and crop up in new places and have done so for thousands of years. There is something in these traditions and organized religions that make them important and valuable for those who practice them. These things have not changed generation after generation.<br />
<br />
The organized religion that I practice, Christianity, is a deep part of who I am as a person. I am learning how to live in a way that is community focused, self giving, and yet full of life. It shapes how I act and how I think. It is a deep part of my identity as a person. I know I do not need to be a Christian in order to be a good person, and I am not Christian because I think it will give me an advantage in the afterlife. What Christianity offers that keeps me going week after week is a relationship with God, who is both relational and wholly other. This is a God who became human so that we might be closer to the divine. This is a God who sees all the faults of the world, all our problems, all the pain, and yet still calls humanity good and seeks to help us become the people we are meant to be. This is a God who triumphs over death and seeks to love those who cause the deepest pains. I would be willing to die for God because God was willing to die for me.<br />
<br />
I am a part of the experimental community called the Church. This has taught me about my identity, cultivated it within me, and communally comes together to support each other as we try to live out this identity. The Church is a community that not only seeks to learn about God, but to learn how we are to be in relationship with one another as Christians and with the rest of the world. We are learning how to shape our relational lives together in a way that mirrors how God relates to us. We ask God to help us not fail in our tasks to live as Christian communities. And some communities fail miserably. Sometimes communities wound. But some communities really do come closer to the heart of the Christian faith and the areas around them are transformed. The divine begins to touch all of the humanity in those regions and affirms that they are indeed God's own creation, beloved and good.<br />
<br />
I affirm that a lot of bad has been done in the name of religion, but I also invite you to also look into all the good that has been done in the name of religion. I also invite you to be open to those whose lives have been transformed by their faith. You don't have to follow their religion, but allow yourself to be inspired by their faith journeys. Some of them are truly incredible. Organized religion has done a lot of bad things, but it has also done a lot of good. I hope you are able to open yourself up to see that balance.<br />
<br />
Thank you for your critical eye, for not taking things at face value. Thank you for questioning motives and holding religious people accountable for their actions. I appreciate your sentiments and I respect them. <br />
<br />
Sincerely,<br />
Zeb<br />
<br />
<br />The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-52371168534539847042015-02-22T11:39:00.001-08:002015-02-22T11:39:36.058-08:00The Wilderness: Sermon from the First Sunday of Lent 2/22/15Delivered at Church of Our Saviour, Atlanta GA<br />
<br />
First Sunday in Lent 2/22/15<br />
<br />
Genesis 9:8-17<br style="background-color: white;" />Psalm 25:1-9<br />1 Peter 3:18-22<br style="background-color: white;" />Mark 1:9-15<br />
The Great Litany BCP p.148<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
Jesus came down from his home in
Nazareth to the banks of the Jordan River. He descended down toward the banks,
searching for the man named John who was baptizing there. John had been waiting
for the one who was greater than him. He baptized with water alone, a baptism
of repentance, but he knew there was one who would come after him, and that
person would baptize with the Holy Spirit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Jesus came to John in the wilderness by the water’s edge. He waded into
the water with John, and John quickly immersed Jesus in the water. There was a
crowd of John’s followers watching him, waiting to greet the newly baptized and
teach him about John’s ways.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But just as
Jesus was coming out of the water the sky tore apart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There was a bright vision of what appeared to
be a dove, gliding down from the sky and resting on Jesus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>John and his followers knew that this was the
Spirit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jesus was the one who was
greater than John.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He had the Spirit,
which he could give to others. But before John and his disciples could speak
with Jesus, he went off into the wilderness. The Spirit had cast him into it.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">Jesus wandered in
the hot desert for forty days. There was little water and little shelter from
the heat.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">This was a dangerous place,
and Jesus had to protect himself from the wild beasts that resided there.
Venomous snakes and scorpions could attack his heels. Wild dogs and jackals
could strike in the night. He was alone in the sandy terrain, exposed to all.
Then Satan came and began to tempt him. All the things of the earth could be
his.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">He could be a king, a ruler of the
earth, with power over all.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">Satan could
make him rich and popular. Wasn’t that all a man could dream of? But Jesus had
a different dream, a different call; one that would make him poor and despised
but was also the will of God.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">It was a
call to proclaim repentance and the kingdom of God.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">As he resisted the
urging of Satan, angels came down and watched over him. The wild beasts did not
attack him, nor did he die of thirst.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">He
was protected. For while the wilderness was a place of danger, it was also a
place where God had protected God’s children.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">When the Israelites escaped the bondage of Egypt, God had led them in
the wilderness in a pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">When the Israelites were hungry in the
wilderness, God had provided them manna from the clouds. When they were
thirsty, the rocks were filled with water.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">The wilderness was where God first came to dwell with the Israelites,
asking them to build a tabernacle, a tent where God could dwell among them. God
had never been closer to them than when they were in the wilderness. While the
people of Israel struggled and fought with God, God remained steadfast beside
them, leading them slowly and surely to the Promised Land.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">And so, Jesus was
driven into the wilderness by the Spirit, not just to be tempted, but to come
closer to the one who had provided in the wilderness. Yes, Jesus was fully
divine, but he was also fully human, and he searched for that thin spot where
he could find the closest connection to the divinity while in his humanity.
This was the wilderness, the place where despite the struggles and because of
the struggles, God’s presence was near. And just as his ancestors had spent
forty years in the wilderness, learning from God and learning about the
struggle to follow God, Jesus spent forty days dwelling with God, learning to
resist the tempter. It was a time of struggle and a time of growth.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">And after he had
dwelt in the desert for forty days, Jesus came out of the desert and went back
to Galilee. He was ready to begin his ministry, having communed with the divine
and learned the ways to resist temptation and the forces of evil.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">He spoke his message clearly and boldly, “The
time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God has come near; repent, and believe in
the good news."</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">And now we have
come to our own time in the wilderness. For forty days we are called to resist
those things that tempt us and look for God who is near in the wilderness. God
is near to us today, as close as the very bread we eat and the very wine we
drink.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">But there are still dangers in
going into the wilderness with God.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">There are those that can attack us, harm us, or destroy us.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">One needs to look no further than Syria to
find those who have given their very lives for this faith.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">In the wilderness, we may be called to places
we don’t really want to go, or to things we would rather not do.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">We are tempted to remain where we are
comfortable. But God is calling us into the wilderness to resist temptation and
to live anew.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">What is it that
God is calling you to in this season in the wilderness? Where do you feel the
stirring of the Spirit calling you to consider a new way of being? Do you need
to repent of unhealthy patterns of living, of apathy, of broken relationships?
Do you try to hold onto too much and do not give things over to God? What is it
that you want the good Lord to deliver you from?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">In this time in
the wilderness, open yourself up to the struggle that comes from being in the
wilderness. Allow yourself to be real and honest with God. Seek help if you
need it. God is calling us into something new. There will be a new ministry and
a new birth on Easter morning, but first we need to live into the wilderness
and seek the thin spaces between God and us.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">This Lenten
season, we will be praying the Great Litany to begin our time of worship
together. This is a prayer that seeks to bring God into every corner of our
lives. We ask God to spare us from all the sinful things that we do and all the
fearful things we encounter. We then ask that God might forgive us, strengthen
us, and have mercy upon us. In the petitions and requests, I encourage you to
find yourself in that great prayer.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">In
the repetitions of our replies, I encourage you to lift your own petitions up
to God.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">And in the silence before the
reception of communion, I encourage you to ask God into those situations and
bring you new life. In your daily life, I encourage you to seek a richer and fuller
prayer life. Try new ways of speaking with God. See how God is answering you.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">I also encourage
you to make a confession if you have not done so before.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">It is scary to voice all that you have done
to a priest, and you can go to another priest if you would feel more
comfortable, but there is something in sharing your sins and receiving
forgiveness that is invaluable. It is a time when you can truly be honest and
humble before God and seek advice to address your greatest needs. Weights have
come off shoulders in the rite of reconciliation. Wounds have been healed.
Miracles happen in the confidential confines of confession.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%;">
<span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">In this season,
seek the closeness of God in the wilderness, knowing that struggle does not
mean that you have been abandoned, and temptation need not be fulfilled.</span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: 0.5in;">And in all things, seek Christ, the bringer
of the kingdom of God. Repent, and believe in the good news.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; text-indent: .5in;">
<o:p></o:p></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-54661550318065666002015-01-23T18:48:00.001-08:002015-01-23T18:48:35.793-08:00Contemplative Silence or Contemplative Words?We started our Church Administration and Leadership class by reading Henri Nouwen's book <i>In the Name of Jesus. </i>In this work he reflects on his life of Christian leadership and talks about the temptations of Christian leadership. The first temptation he points to is the temptation of relevance, of wanting to be seen as somebody special instead of being somebody after God's own heart. His suggestion for countering that temptation was contemplative prayer. I think he's right about that. I also think that means I have a lot of work to do.<br />
I keep on thinking that I should be more into silent meditation. I know several different contemplative prayer practices, but I keep coming back to the practice of sitting in silence and I get frustrated at how much I suck at it. I am so heady and wordy. I create dialogues in my head and had begun this blog post three times in my mind before it ever got onto paper. That is how I operate in the world. I create my own commentary. So when I try to focus on one word, try to clear my mind of other thoughts, I struggle. I either fall asleep or just feel uncomfortable. But how can I wait on God when I can't release myself from inner commentary? This is what I struggle with.<br />
I know other practices that work better for me. Repeating prayers and listening to familiar music are ways I can simply be. Journaling and blogging are ways for me to release the commentary and see if God might actually be leading me in my thoughts. But I worry about being heady. I think we all worry about finding that line between what is God's will and what is my will. What are God's thoughts and what are mine? Am I actually listening to God at all or am I just doing my own thing? And that is why I want to be able to sit in silence. I want to be able to clear my mind and just sit. While I know there are other methods of contemplative prayer that come more naturally, I guess I have a bias towards silent meditation. It feels more "authentic" than staring out the window on the bus purposely listening to music that is so familiar, I don't even really hear it anymore.<br />
My professor kind of glossed over contemplative prayer, saying we need to do the kind of prayer where we just listen to God, but I wish he had said more. My husband has devoted his life to contemplative prayer, I've taken classes in it, and I still don't quite get it. I don't know what does or doesn't count. I worry that I don't pray enough or I don't pray the right way. I wish that I could be confident in my prayer life. But my prayer life looks an awful lot like a person listening to music on a bus. I fear this doesn't really count.<br />
The other day as I was coming back from class, worrying about contemplative prayer, I realized I was sitting on the other side of the bus from where I usually sit. And through the window I could see businesses on the other street over, a street I had never been to before. I saw things I had never seen in nearly two years of taking the same bus to school. And my commentary began. I thought, "Maybe contemplative prayer is simply about being receptive. Maybe it is waiting and being open to glimpses of the unseen. A lot of the time nothing happens, but sometimes you get a glimpse of God, and maybe that is what it is all about."<br />
For now, I am not sure sitting in silence would really work for me. I need stimuli that put me into a prayerful state, and right now, those things are all filled with words. Not just one word, but many words. Words about God and for God. Words that come from my heart and other people's hearts. Familiar words. In this sea of words, I find myself able to move in and out of inner dialogue, able to sit with God without feeling uncomfortable or intimidated by the process. And maybe that is enough for now. Later I can work on the silence, but maybe right now I really need the words.<br />
I live with the same fears I had as a child. When I was young, I told my mother that I was bad at praying because I couldn't keep my eyes closed. She revealed to me that many people pray with their eyes open. I fear that I cannot pray in the silence. Maybe it is okay to pray with the words.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-67538306605264919662014-12-04T19:43:00.001-08:002014-12-04T19:44:08.035-08:00Thoughts on Ferguson, Staten Island, and Police Brutality from an Officer's ChildWhen Michael Brown was killed in Ferguson, I assumed that something must have happened to cause Officer Wilson to use lethal force. I knew what it would take for the law enforcement officers I knew to pull a trigger. They would have to be in danger of losing their lives. Now I am not so sure what happened in Ferguson. I don't know how a police officer telling two young men not to jay walk turned into deadly use of force. The documents don't make sense to me. Something is not right.<br />
<br />
Then Eric Garner was choked to death by an officer in Staten Island, and I don't know how that happened either. I don't get it. That should never have happened. If the police were arresting him, then all they needed was to put handcuffs on, and if he was resistant, there are ways to get him into the back of a patrol car that don't result in death.<br />
<br />
I have been listening a lot to my black colleagues and classmates recently. Listening, but not saying much, because it's hard for me to take it all in. It's hard to figure it out. It's not the picture I have in my mind of the police force and I grieve what I am hearing and learning from my colleagues.<br />
<br />
My father was a police officer in small towns for years. When I think of a white police officer, I naturally think of Dad coming home at the end of the day in his uniform. When I was 10, he became a probation/parole officer at a men's residential facility, and he proudly talks about helping men to examine their lives, to take actions to avoid years in prison and to live successful lives. When he runs into former clients, he is usually greeted with a smile and a handshake.<br />
<br />
I have grown up for years hearing stories about Dad's law enforcement friends, people like the officer who refused to put tickets on the cars left in front of the bars at night because he wasn't going to penalize people recognized that they couldn't drive and found other ways home.<br />
<br />
Recently I married a former police officer, and he boasts of how he had the lowest use of force rate while he was on the force. He always tried to talk to people and did everything he could to resolve situations without using force.<br />
<br />
These are my images of the police force, and these are the images that I want to be the norm for every person residing in the United States. Sadly, more and more I am learning that my image is not the norm, especially for people of color, and that is not okay with me. I don't want people to be afraid of the police, I don't want to see them as enemies or as brutal people, I want them to see people like my father and my husband and the thousands of other wonderful people who are and have been law enforcement agents in the United States.<br />
<br />
To change the image, we need justice. We need people standing up and saying this is not okay. It is not okay to shoot a man for questionable reasons and leave his body laying in the street for four hours. It is not okay to choke a man until he dies. It is not okay to let the questionable and corrupt actions of some law enforcement officers slide. Not only do these actions deny the value of the lives of black people, but these officers are not living out their duty to protect and serve the people in their communities. It is not okay for them to get away with not doing their job. We cannot let that slide.<br />
<br />
My father is currently on the Citizens' Police Review Board in his community. It is a group of citizens assigned to examine complaints against police officers in their community and to make recommendations about what actions should be taken. It is a way that the community can hold the police force accountable. Though the board has no direct say on what happens to police officers who fail to protect and serve, they can be a voice against corruption. I want a Citizen's Police Review Board in every city across the United States. I want the board's demographics to reflect those of the community the board represents, and I want their voices to matter when it comes to reprimanding officers or taking cases against them to trial.<br />
<br />
Perhaps it is also time to ensure that those who examine cases brought against police officers are not connected to the police department or the community those officers serve. We need impartial people reviewing the actions of police officers and deciding what actions need to be taken. The grand jury system doesn't appear to be working, and we perhaps need a different way of reviewing cases against our law enforcement officials.<br />
<br />
Most importantly though, we need to connect the police force back to the community. We need to focus on training officers who can not only enforce the law, but also serve the people. I want law enforcement officers on the streets who genuinely care about the people they protect. <br />
Ideally, they should be from the community itself and reflect the community's demographics.<br />
<br />
I don't want to live in a world where people put up their hands in a gesture to say "Don't shoot". I don't want to live in a country where people of color are afraid of the police. I want a police force like the one I learned about growing up. I want men and women who are passionate about protecting and serving their communities patrolling the streets and I want officers who use force in inappropriate ways to be reprimanded accordingly. I want communities to be invested in their officers and officers invested in their communities.<br />
<br />
This is not a lofty goal, but it takes commitment. We have to take seriously the critiques of persons of color against police officers and train our police force so they can serve all the people in their communities, not just the ones that look like them. We have to take seriously the actions of officers who use their force in inappropriate ways, especially when their use of force results in death. We cannot stand for corruption within our police force and law enforcement system. We have to commit to improving it. I want the primary image of a police officer in every community to be that of every wonderful and dedicated officer who puts their life on the line to protect and serve their community. I want them to imagine people like my husband and my dad.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-28016086229807436722014-09-19T19:37:00.003-07:002014-09-19T19:44:00.168-07:00Why do we go to church?For the past several months, if not years, I have been musing over the question, "Why do we go to church?" It seems like a straightforward answer and many would affirm that one goes to church to learn about and worship God. But if that is all church is about, then if one reads from the Bible, says their prayers, reads books on the subject, and has access to any number of resources online, why do we still get together in buildings? What is the point of gathering for worship?<br />
My first inclination was to say that it is for the sacraments. Indeed, I do not think I would be half the person I am if I didn't get some extra Jesus in my life through the Eucharist. It slowly but surely helps me to become a little more like Jesus, week after week, wafer after wafer. Jesus physically enters into the body and nourishes it. He transforms the physical body as well as the soul. There is nothing more awe inspiring to me than that. Surely the sacraments must be why we go to church. <br />
But then I look at the vast majority of protestant churches, with a variety of beliefs about the sacraments and a variety of time tables for when they receive them. How can I say going to church is all about the sacraments when there are so many churches don't receive the Eucharist on a weekly basis or have different theologies about it? And what about the Quakers? They do not take physical sacraments at all, but rather experience spiritual baptism and communion. What is the reason that all these groups continue to gather every week?<br />
So I went back to the drawing board and I decided that it must be about community. This is why the church gathers, to be a community that can shape each other as everyone works to better understand who God is and how God is working in their lives. It is all about learning from one another and growing with each other. Indeed, if an individual tries to understand God on their own, there is a great likelihood that the god they worship will end up being their own ideas and interpretations. How do they know if their ideas are valid unless they are challenged and molded by the others around them? But then what is to stop an entire church community from making their own false idols? How easily do some churches become cults of a pastor's personality? Indeed, a church community is always in some way shaped by the personality of the person in charge. There is no getting around that fact. So how does being a part of a congregation help a person with their faith if their faith could potentially be led astray by the person in charge?<br />
So I mulled about this for a while, knowing that what I felt about the sacraments was true and what I felt about community was true, but having trouble connecting the dots.<br />
I also began to muse about why I went to chapel services at my seminary. To be honest, the mish-mash of traditions drives me a little batty. So do I go for my own spiritual edification? Yes and no. Whether or not the preacher interests me or whether I think the service will be good hardly factors into why my butt is in the pew. Is it some sense of duty? Kind of. I left for a while and came back because I felt that it was important as the president of a student organization to be there. But if that were the only thing, I wouldn't feel a deeper need to be there. There was something else driving me besides my own sense of student leadership. And I could easily not go. A lot of people don't. That's not a judgment on anyone, I understand many of the reasons why people don't go and I don't go all the time. But more often than not, my butt is in that pew.<br />
And that is where I found a piece of the answer that I was looking for. I show up not because I think chapel will be terrific. I show up because you never know when Christ is going to come and say something important. Sometimes there's nothing of note that happens. I come, I do the worship routine, I leave. But sometimes something really unexpected happens. A song grabs me, a scripture startles me, or a sermon really gets me. Christ comes when I'm not really expecting Him. Christ can come at any moment. And sometimes it's not even anything in the service order itself that strikes me. Sometimes it's the people around me. It's amazing to me how putting my butt in a pew has allowed me to meet more of my fellow students than I could have ever met in the halls. As we share together before services, we are able to connect in sometimes unexpected ways.<br />
Finally I was able to piece together what it meant to go to church. A church service often contains all we need to better hear the call of Christ for our days and our lives. Sometimes Christ is felt in songs or scripture or sermon. Sometimes Christ is felt most in fellowship and feast. But Christ is always there. Indeed God is present in every element in our lives. And it's not that we have to gather communally to worship, but when we do, when we come as God's People to hear God's Word, we can be changed. There is transformation power in community. There is resurrection power in the Word. Sometimes the community doesn't always align perfectly with the Word. It is resistant to where God is calling it, its doctrines don't always mesh up, but still it seeks. And when the Body of Christ sinks into the People of God and claims it as its own, things happen. Communities change. People are not the same. The Kingdom enters our kingdoms.<br />
So why do we gather together? Why do we go to church? Because we believe that the Word of God can change lives. We believe that Christ can come into hearts at any given moment, and this isn't just a one time thing, but a continual thing, shaping people into the Body of Christ. And when the Body of Christ comes together and seeks God together, the Kingdom of God can enter the world. It may be only glimpses or foretastes, but those moments energize us and revitalize us for the work that will lead to the Kingdom truly inhabiting our planet. We come because we believe Christ can and does change the world.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-32398806928828539622014-08-05T23:29:00.000-07:002014-08-05T23:29:21.735-07:00Leaving Cape TownMy roommates have left, the apartment is empty, and I am cleaning up, preparing to turn over the keys and get on a plane tonight. There has not been a single day when I was not homesick, when I did not long for my home with my fiance. And I am so excited to go back to him, to go back to our home and to our friends, and to our life together.<br />
<br />
But this trip has been good for me. Besides being able to experience all the beauty around Cape Town, I have gotten to work with people I would not have considered partnering with before. I knew that I was going to learn about the religious experiences of sex workers, but I had no idea that I would be sharing office space with people who work in the office by day and sell sex at night. I have met many sex workers and played with their children. I have seen what it means for someone to be an impoverished transgender woman, but I've also seen their souls dance as they come together for support. I've learned about the struggles many people have on the street, and about the struggles people have in the townships. If one lives in either place, it is sometimes hard to keep dry. And in a cold winter when nobody has centrally heated homes, the wetter you are, the worse it gets. I've heard people talk about doing drugs just so they don't feel the cold and the wet at night.<br />
<br />
I've also studied a lot and thought a lot about the church's theology of sex, and what it means to hold the idea that sex is something special and sacred, but also what it means when sex is a way to provide for yourself and your family. What does it mean to commodify sex? But then what also does it mean that economically, it is hard for many who come from poverty to leave poverty? What does it mean that unemployment rates nationwide in South Africa are high. What does it mean to have to support yourself and this job pays well when one gets enough clients?<br />
<br />
But the most important thing I've learned is that Christ is not confined to those society would like to label as "decent". Christ sometimes shows up in the weirdest of places, like an organization that supports sex workers. They challenged my idea of who a Christian can be. I learned about experiences of growing up and moving away from the church, but I also learned about some who are faithful, who sit in that pew every Sunday, who pray and read their Bible, who have an active relationship with God, yet are also providing for themselves and their families through sex work. They made me wonder, who can a Christian be?<br />
<br />
The complexity of Christianity is when we begin to see that others whom we would rather ignore or push out have the Holy Spirit in them too. Then we have to experience Christ in a new way, as active in the lives of those we would prefer he not work in. We must ask what being Christian means, what salvation means, what it actually looks like, and whether someone can be both saved and sinner, poor yet rich in heaven. It's complex. It's challenging. We have been struggling with it for over 2000 years.<br />
<br />
And so as I get ready to leave South Africa, I think about them and I am grateful to have met them. I was homesick every day, I can't wait to go home, but this trip was good. These people are worth knowing, worth leaving my home and going halfway around the world to meet.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-59391081593612425602014-06-06T10:23:00.001-07:002014-06-06T10:23:07.808-07:00Cape Town Sex Workers and Christ I still don't quite know how I ended up doing an internship with a sex worker advocacy organization called SWEAT in Cape Town, South Africa. Something called me to be here, and I think it was more than just being able to experience a South African winter instead of the heat of the American summer. I guess I wanted to learn from other's experiences, to sit and talk with those society is so quick to reject. I wanted to work with the oppressed, like Jesus did.<br />
So far I've spent a week learning about the lives of sex workers, meeting them, and observing the programs they have put together to support each other. I've also spent a week examining my own stigma against sex work. I would be lying if I said I was comfortable with the concept of people selling sex to make a living. I am not. But the truth of the matter is that these workers are adults, whose average age is 27. They tend to be free agents, who aren't trafficked or pimped out. They work because this work is profitable. They can at least double the incomes that they could make in other jobs. And they aren't bad people. They are people who have chosen for whatever reason to do sex work. I may not be comfortable with all of what their jobs entail, but I can support programs that seek to empower them and support them. They are all God's children.<br />
The other day, I went to observe a large support group for women sex workers. They began their time together with a prayer. During the break, one woman asked me what I was doing and told me that many sex workers are religious and active in churches and mosques. There is a spirituality, a yearning for God's love that runs deep within the veins of many of these workers, not just women, but men as well. There is a dream that runs deep within many of these people that someday they might be able to work in a legal industry and be able to tell their religious leaders their profession without the fear that they might be kicked out or publicly condemned. <br />And in the background of all this, I see Jesus, walking up to a woman who has been condemned of adultery, about to be stoned to death. He looks at the people, rocks in their hands, and says, "Whoever is without sin, cast the first stone." And the stones are laid down, and the people walk away.<br />
I am learning to put down my stone and interact with others whose lives can seem so foreign to me. I am learning that sometimes the life that needs more Christ is not the other's, but my own. And may God use me so that I may help others become the whole people God created them to be. The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-40811028388518459202014-04-21T06:29:00.002-07:002014-04-21T06:29:37.625-07:003 Last Words of Jesus: Good Friday 2014On Good Friday this year, I was asked to share in expounding upon the seven last words of Jesus. I was given three of them. <br />
<br />
<b>"Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in Paradise"</b><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Luke 23:42-43<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>There were
three men who were brought up the hill to be crucified that day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One of them was Jesus, a man so weak; the
soldiers forced Simon of Cyrene, who had been in the crowd, to carry his cross
for him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The soldiers kept mocking him,
telling him that if he was the Messiah, if he was the King of the Jews, he
could save himself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They laughed as they
hung the inscription above him, King of the Jews. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>But the
other two hung there were there for good reason.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They were criminals, receiving the death
sentence for the wrongs they had committed. Who knows what actions they may
have done to deserve this sentence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>These criminals watched the proceedings along with the crowds, but they
not only saw Jesus being nailed to the cross, they were nailed to their own as
well. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>One of the
criminals derided Jesus, just like the soldiers who were hanging him on the
cross.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He mocked, saying,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Are you not the Messiah? Save yourself and
us!” He laughed and jeered along with the others. He was upon a cross, a man
condemned to die the same death as Jesus, yet even he was mocking Jesus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>The other
criminal couldn’t take it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He had seen
the crowds and the soldiers mocking Jesus, and he had kept silent. But to hear
someone mock Jesus as he was hanging next to him on a cross?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That he could not stand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He stood up for Jesus, saying, “Do you not
fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? And we indeed
have been condemned justly, for we are getting what we deserve for our deeds,
but this man has done nothing wrong.” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>It is
unclear how much this man might have known about Jesus’ ministry. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What he did know was that Jesus should not be
crucified.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He did not do anything that
would warrant the death penalty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
witnessed how Jesus had been treated, and he could not turn his back at the
final insult hurled at Jesus. So he spoke up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>After he
rebuked his fellow criminal, he turned to Jesus and said, “Jesus, remember me
when you come into your kingdom.” Remember me when you come into your
kingdom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He looked at the inscription
over Jesus’ head, and he confessed Jesus as King.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He understood who Jesus was. Even when
everyone else was mocking Jesus and laughing at him, this criminal saw the
Messiah.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He looked at a weak, bleeding
body, a person who was nailed to a cross, and saw the Messiah.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When everybody else missed the Christ in
their midst, a criminal dying on a cross saw him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He saw him. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I wonder
how often we miss the Christ in our midst, the Messiah alongside us. How often
do we go along with the crowd, mocking others? How often do we declare anybody
to be less?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Less human, less deserving,
less needy? How often do we fail to respect the dignity of every human being? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>But we don’t
always fail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes we see.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes we stand up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes we fight for the dignity of others.
Sometimes, in this world of pain, in a world that so often mocks the way of the
cross, we find ourselves as the only ones who can stand up in the face of
derision and rejection.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We recognize the
body of Christ, still in our world. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
<o:AllowPNG/>
</o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
</xml><![endif]-->
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>JA</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:EnableOpenTypeKerning/>
<w:DontFlipMirrorIndents/>
<w:OverrideTableStyleHps/>
<w:UseFELayout/>
</w:Compatibility>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="276">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]-->
<!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<!--StartFragment-->
<!--EndFragment--></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In those moments, I imagine Jesus looking up, bloody and
tired, hanging on a cross, but he looks us straight in the eyes, smiling a
little as he says, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in Paradise.” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>"I am thirsty"</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
John 19:28<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I am thirsty” the Messiah cries. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The same Messiah who had talked with a woman of Samaria at a
well, saying, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but
those who drink of the water that I will give them will never be thirsty.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This Messiah longs for a drink.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The same Messiah who told the crowds, “I am the bread of
life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry, and whoever believes in me will
never be thirsty.” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This Messiah thirsts.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The same Messiah who cried out, “Let anyone who is thirsty
come to me, and let the one who believes in me drink.” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This Messiah cries, “I am thirsty.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This man, this divine, feels the thirst of the world. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He feels the ache of the world. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
All the pain and suffering ride upon his wounded back. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He leads us in expressing our want. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Our need.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Our thirst.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For our Messiah is thirsty. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As the deer longs for the water-brooks, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So our souls long for you, O God.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Our souls are athirst for God, athirst for the living God;<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When shall we come to appear before the presence of God?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Why are you so full of heaviness, our souls?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And why are you so disquieted within us?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Put your trust in God; <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For we will yet give thanks to him,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Who is the help of our countenance, and our God. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As the deer longs for the water-brooks, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So Jesus’ soul thirsted. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The heart of God ached upon that cross. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The fountain of life poured itself out. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The wellspring of life dripped its last drop.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yet we can put our trust in God. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For we will yet give thanks to him, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Who is our savior, our help, and our God. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Oh God, you are our God; eagerly we seek you;<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Our souls thirst for you, our flesh faints for you,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As in a barren and dry land where there is no water. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For your loving-kindness is better than life itself,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Our lips shall give you praise.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So will we bless you as long as we live, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And lift up our hands in your Name. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For you have been our helper,<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And under the shadow of your wings we will rejoice. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Our souls cling to you;<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Your right hand holds us fast. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The savior who said, “Let anyone who is thirsty come to me,
and let the one who believes in me drink.” is thirsty; <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Come let us give him drink. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Let us give him our hearts, <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Let us bless him as long as we shall live. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
<o:AllowPNG/>
</o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
</xml><![endif]-->
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>JA</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:EnableOpenTypeKerning/>
<w:DontFlipMirrorIndents/>
<w:OverrideTableStyleHps/>
<w:UseFELayout/>
</w:Compatibility>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="276">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]-->
<!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<!--StartFragment-->
<!--EndFragment--></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><br /></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p><b>"It is Finished"</b> </o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
John 19:30<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>We had
spent the last few days going back and forth to the hospital.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had a carefully planned calendar, ensuring
that should Grandma’s time come, she would not be alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It had stopped being a matter of if she would
die but when. We sang hymns to her, and we prayed for her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then one afternoon several of us were in her
room, keeping our vigil.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The family was
conversing, and I was spending my time coloring.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of a sudden a deep quiet took over the
room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We all instinctively drew around
her bed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We watched as she took her last
breaths.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She gasped once, twice, and
then silence filled the room.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We began
to pray. Her spirit left her, and later that week we put her body to rest. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Jesus’
death looked different from my grandmother’s death.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was in her seventies dying of a long-term
illness in a hospital bed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jesus was in
his thirties.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was beaten, wounded,
and nailed to a cross.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His death was
violent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But just like my grandmother’s
death, there were some who kept vigil, waiting with him, making sure he was not
alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can imagine the three Marys and
the beloved disciple gathered around the foot of Jesus’ cross.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They had never expected to find themselves
here, they did not wish for this to be happening, but here they were and they
could not look back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was no longer a
question of if Jesus would die, but when.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>They kept their vigil at the foot of the cross, watching and
waiting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then all of a sudden there came
a quiet upon them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They instinctively
drew closer to Jesus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They knew his time
was near.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then they heard his final
words, “It is finished.” He took his last few breaths, gasping once, twice, and
then silence filled the earth. He gave up his spirit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then they too, working with Joseph of
Arimathia and Nicodemus, put Jesus’ body to rest. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>Dying is a
sacred act.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Death is a sacred
moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Every last breath both releases
a spirit and fills this world with a hole, a place of emptiness, where someone
once was, but is no longer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There is an
ache. There is a loss. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>The three
Marys and the beloved disciple were able to witness the most sacred of these
moments, the moment when the Messiah who had been incarnate in the world was no
longer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He gave up his spirit.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>With that came a deep ache and a deep
loss.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There was a Christ shaped hole left
in this world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p>
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
<o:AllowPNG/>
</o:OfficeDocumentSettings>
</xml><![endif]-->
<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:WordDocument>
<w:View>Normal</w:View>
<w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom>
<w:TrackMoves/>
<w:TrackFormatting/>
<w:PunctuationKerning/>
<w:ValidateAgainstSchemas/>
<w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid>
<w:IgnoreMixedContent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent>
<w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText>
<w:DoNotPromoteQF/>
<w:LidThemeOther>EN-US</w:LidThemeOther>
<w:LidThemeAsian>JA</w:LidThemeAsian>
<w:LidThemeComplexScript>X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>
<w:Compatibility>
<w:BreakWrappedTables/>
<w:SnapToGridInCell/>
<w:WrapTextWithPunct/>
<w:UseAsianBreakRules/>
<w:DontGrowAutofit/>
<w:SplitPgBreakAndParaMark/>
<w:EnableOpenTypeKerning/>
<w:DontFlipMirrorIndents/>
<w:OverrideTableStyleHps/>
<w:UseFELayout/>
</w:Compatibility>
<m:mathPr>
<m:mathFont m:val="Cambria Math"/>
<m:brkBin m:val="before"/>
<m:brkBinSub m:val="--"/>
<m:smallFrac m:val="off"/>
<m:dispDef/>
<m:lMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:rMargin m:val="0"/>
<m:defJc m:val="centerGroup"/>
<m:wrapIndent m:val="1440"/>
<m:intLim m:val="subSup"/>
<m:naryLim m:val="undOvr"/>
</m:mathPr></w:WordDocument>
</xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
<w:LatentStyles DefLockedState="false" DefUnhideWhenUsed="true"
DefSemiHidden="true" DefQFormat="false" DefPriority="99"
LatentStyleCount="276">
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="0" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Normal"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="heading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="9" QFormat="true" Name="heading 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="toc 9"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="35" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" Name="Default Paragraph Font"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="59" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed="false" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
</w:LatentStyles>
</xml><![endif]-->
<!--[if gte mso 10]>
<style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-priority:99;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;}
</style>
<![endif]-->
<!--StartFragment-->
<!--EndFragment--></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>We know
that this is not the end of the story, but today, let us contemplate the
absence felt that day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jesus had been
the Christ, living in the world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
laughed, he cried, he touched people.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
was in flesh. Then it all got taken away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>In less than a week Jesus went from a beloved healer and revolutionary
figure to dying on the cross. The crowds that once cried “Hosanna” had turned
around and began to chant, “Crucify him.” When he was led off, his mother, Mary
Magdalene, Mary the wife of Cleopas and the beloved disciple came and watched
vigil over him in his time of need, so he would not die alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, finally, after several hours of agony,
he said simply, “It is finished” and he died.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The loss of Jesus left a deep pain and a deep hole in the world.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Those who followed him must have felt that
the incarnation had come to an end.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>There would be no more Messiah. God would no longer walk beside them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This death was a truly sacred and a truly
painful moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-42378667722152614942014-03-05T18:27:00.003-08:002014-03-05T18:27:34.329-08:00Ash Wednesday Sermon 3/5/14<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%; text-indent: .5in;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Every year, I come, needing
a Lenten season. When I was a teenager, I would tell my parents that lent was
the only time when church seemed real.
It felt like the only time when the church gave people space to express
their hurts, their woundedness, and their pains. I no longer believe that lent is the only
time when this happens, but my younger self yearned for space to just sit in
the ashes. The ashes appeared
otherworldly and transformative to me.
The ashen cross was such a powerful image to me that for several years
in my late teens, I took up carrying the cross on my cheek, painted on daily
with eyeliner. I wanted the cross to
mold my heart and my actions into conformity with Christ. I wanted to be transformed by it. And now here we are again, coming to bear
this ashen cross upon our own foreheads, marking ourselves as mortal and
fallible, asking in humble penitence to be transformed. <o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> This
is a transformation that began at our baptism. We were all baptized into the
death of Christ, that we may live in the power of his resurrection. This season we focus on our baptism into
Christ’s death. It is a time to consider
those mortal things that need to die within us, so that we may rise anew with
Christ on Easter. <o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> At
baptism we pray for the candidates, asking that they may be delivered from the
way of sin and death. What are we asking
God to deliver us from today? <o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> We
ask that their hearts may be opened to God’s grace and truth. What are the things that we have shut tightly
within our own hearts that we need to open to God?<o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> We
ask they may be filled with God’s holy and life-giving Spirit. Where are our own spirits thirsting? <o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> I
encourage you during this time to read back through the prayers offered at
baptism and the promises made in the baptismal covenant. Meditate upon them. Where do you need God’s
help in fulfilling these in your own life?
At the end of these forty days, we will renew our baptismal covenants at
the Easter Vigil. <o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> Our
baptisms sealed us as Christ’s own forever, but we don’t always live fully into
our Christian identities. Our gospel
lesson today warns us about that. There
are many who do good things. There are
many who pray and give to God. And they
have their reward for that. But their intentions aren’t where they should be. Rather than coming seeking God’s will,
looking towards God’s own heart, they do things for show. It becomes more about seeking the approval of
others. <o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> Jesus
amplifies the problems so we can see them within our own lives. We may not sound trumpets before giving
offerings, we may not pray out loud on street corners, and we may not disfigure
our faces while fasting, but we all have these kinds of tendencies. Sometimes we want to do the right things to
please people rather than to please God. And there are rewards for that, but they
pale in comparison to God’s rewards. <o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> God’s
rewards aren’t tangible things and I don’t think God’s reward is simply heaven
instead of hell. In fact I don’t even
like the word reward here, because it makes it seem like God gives us something
because we act a certain way. And I
don’t think that’s how it works. I think
that by seeking after God’s will, we are able to open ourselves up to God. All of ourselves. We can begin to open up all the shames we
have, all the hurts we hold, all the wretchedness that we feel. Through that act, we open ourselves up to
grace that is beyond measure. The
everlasting God who hates nothing they have made is given free rein to forgive
our sins, and to make in us new and contrite hearts. Transformation is able to happen. Not because we did actions that God approved
of, but because we were able to give up our own control and let God work. <o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> It’s
hard work to do this. We are human and
we are dust. Sometimes when we feel how
small we are, how mortal we are, we get protective. We want to store every
piece of who we are up into ourselves, as if we could keep ourselves from
falling. But if we pray earnestly, if we
give control over to God and learn to live in God, despite uncertainty, we can
learn a bigger truth. We are human, we
are dust, but we are also beloved.
Deeply and truly beloved. Beyond
all measure and beyond all logic. Beloved.<o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"> So
come forward for ashes, leaving not with a smudge on your forehead, but a
symbol. A symbol that the one who hates
nothing that they have made and forgives the sins of all who are penitent longs
to create and make in us new and contrite hearts. This is the transformative nature of the
cross, and this is the promise we can carry with us throughout the Lenten
season. </span></strong><strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; font-weight: normal; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></strong></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<strong><span style="font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I want to leave you with a poem by Jan Richardson
entitled “Will You Meet Us: A Blessing for Ash Wednesday:</span></strong><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Will you meet us<br />
in the ashes<br />
will you meet us<br />
in the ache<br />
and show your face<br />
within our sorrow<br />
and offer us<br />
your word of grace:</span><span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">That you are life<br />
within the dying<br />
that you abide<br />
within the dust<br />
that you are what<br />
survives the burning<br />
that you arise<br />
to make us new.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 115%;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">And in our aching<br />
you are breathing<br />
and in our weeping<br />
you are here<br />
within the hands<br />
that bear your blessing<br />
enfolding us<br />
within your love.</span><span style="color: #1f4e79; font-size: 18.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-bidi-font-size: 11.0pt; mso-themecolor: accent1; mso-themeshade: 128;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-14219018104751789502014-02-21T18:29:00.002-08:002014-02-21T18:30:22.077-08:00Sermon From 2/20 on Psalm 46<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #44546a; mso-themecolor: text2;"> </span> <span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> <span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;">Let us pray: Dear
LORD God, who is our refuge and strength, be with us as we seek a more perfect
understanding of you today. May my words
illumine and not cloud your message as we seek to understand you, oh LORD of
Hosts. In the name of the Father, Son,
and Holy Spirit, Amen.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> This
passage for today brings a word of comfort. “God is our refuge and strength, a
very present help in trouble.” I grew up singing the first two verses in Sunday
school. Similarly, I could name half a
dozen songs that use the beautiful words, “Be still and know I am God!” These verses
and phrases are familiar, like a well-loved blanket that can keep us warm
through cold winter nights. However, the familiarity can sometimes make it hard
to see the power of the message provided.
This psalm is not merely a song of comfort, this is a song of hope for a
better day, a strong belief that God will not let one fall, despite the chaos
that can engulf one’s life. It is an
assertion that through God, we can find refuge from all sorts of anxieties that
can plague our lives. God can be our refuge and strength, in times of both
external and internal struggle.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> The
psalm begins with the bold acclamation that “we will not fear, though the earth
should change, though the mountains shake in the heart of the sea”. The earth and the mountains are both images
of the permanent, images of the things that bring order and comfort to our
lives. In this passage these fixtures
are being thrown into chaos. The chaotic
waters of the foamy sea threaten to destroy everything. Those things that are
important threaten to collapse in front of our very eyes. But the psalmist asserts that God is our
refuge and strength and will be a present help in trouble. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Another image
this psalm uses to express this threating chaos is the image of nations in an
uproar, and tottering kingdoms. This is
an image of government instability and high death tolls. People are dying in battle, and all that the
government does becomes questioned.
Everything is in flux, and it feels as if chaos is about to overcome
nations. Yet, when God utters God’s
voice, the earth melts, and there is a restoration of calm. It is asserted that the Lord of hosts is
indeed with us and the God of Jacob is our refuge. Though the mountains feel
like they are about to shake and crumble into the sea, though it feels as if
anarchy and chaos are right around the corner, God is our refuge. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> The war
imagery of this psalm is expanded further.
The psalmist invites others to come and behold the works of the LORD. God is not merely a safe haven, something to
be turned to for comfort. God is the one
who can make all wars cease, and the one who can destroy the implements of
destruction. God is powerful. Out of this imagery comes the phrase, “Be
still and know that I am God.” It may seem like an odd phrase to come after an
image of world peace, but it is not simply about being motionless and basking
in God. The Jewish Publication Society’s
translation carries the full impact of the phrase. It translates the verse as “Desist! Realize
that I am God!” This is not about simply
finding time to step away and contemplate God, it is about stopping in the
middle of the chaos and coming back to the divine. Chaos may appear to be imminent, but rather
than feeding into the fear of that chaos and being swept up in it, we are
called to stop and take the time to center on God. God is the one who dominates both the nations
and the earth, and God has the ability to carry you through. Though chaos may be looming, God is a refuge
on whom we can rely. We just have to stop and refocus. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> It is
assumed that this psalm was probably written before the temple was destroyed
and the Israelites were cast out into exile away from their land. That is because this psalm asserts that God
will protect God’s holy habitation, which is the temple in Jerusalem. But there is no historical way to know if
this was written before the Israelites were cast away from their land or
afterwards. But I wonder what an
Israelite would have heard when this psalm was sung in exile. Their temple, their beloved city of Jerusalem
seemed all but gone. They were strangers
in a strange land, and everything that had once seemed permanent and stable was
destroyed. Yet, God was asserted to be
their refuge and help. God would still
be there to help them in their times of deepest need. God was still in the midst of their city,
their beloved Jerusalem, and maybe, just maybe, the Israelite could return
home. In the midst of the turmoil and
pain that surrounded their current situation, there was hope. They could look
to God as their refuge. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> <span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;">Our world today looks almost nothing like the world of the ancient
Israelites. In the US, we do not worry
about bows and spears, or the chaos of the sea.
We use planes, and worry about bombs and guns. But we do share the
common experience of fear and anxiety.
And we have documented the crippling effects that fear and anxiety can
have on humanity. We may not be as
afraid of the literal world crashing down around us, but many are fearful of
their own worlds caving in on them. Panic
attacks cause some to feel as though they are on the verge of death. PTSD causes others to be transported back to
their most traumatic experiences, and even their sleep can be invaded by the
worst nightmares. What does it mean for
them to find God to be a refuge in this arena of chaos? <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> My fiancé is a
combat veteran of the war in Iraq. Soon
after he came home from war close to nine years ago, he was diagnosed with
PTSD. He experienced the chaos of
feeling himself transported time and time again back into the trauma of
war. I do not know many details of his
early struggles with the disease, but he spent years reliving his experiences,
both in his nightmares and in his therapist’s office as he went through
exposure therapy. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> In the midst of his turmoil, he connected with an old
friend and found himself attending the meetings of a new monastic community
that focused on contemplative spirituality and centering prayer. There he found a greater ability to connect
to the life giving Holy Spirit, the river that makes glad the city of God. He
was able to learn techniques that allowed him to not only calm himself in
moments of frustration, but also learned how to stop and shift his focus onto
God. He learned what it meant to truly be still and know that God is God. Through his psychiatric treatment he found
strength to beat back the chaos, and through his monastic community, he found a
way to make God his refuge. He isn’t
cured, but he has found hope and renewal.
He is coming out of his own exile, closer to the Holy Habitation of the
Most High. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> His story is unique, but his search is something we all
face at one time or another. Some of us
may experience anxiety disorders, while others experience anxiety caused by
specific stressors. Either can feel
overwhelming at times, and we may worry that the seemingly permanent things in
our lives might devolve into chaos. We
may fear that our lives will never be peaceful again, that we will be overtaken
by the sweeping waves of the seas as they shake our very cores. It can often be
difficult to stop and refocus upon God, relying upon God as a refuge. And relying on God as a refuge doesn’t mean
that the situation will clear up. The
waters still roar and foam, causing the mountains to tremble. The nations are still in an uproar. The Israelite is still in exile. My fiancé still has PTSD. But things do slowly improve. Maybe not right away, but when the vision
shifts to God, God can begin to become a true refuge, providing us with
strength in these times of trouble. It’s a slow process of learning to stop and
shift focus. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> The good news is that this process is not done alone.
There is a river whose streams can make glad your inner city of God. The Holy Spirit is always with us. Even in those times when we are blind to
God’s call, when anxiety has us by the gills, there’s still an advocate for
us. We still have the Holy Spirit to
guide and protect us. Even if we cannot
recognize it, even if the chaos is overwhelming, God is our refuge because the
Holy Spirit is God. The LORD of Hosts is
always with us, the God of Jacob is always our refuge. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In
the midst of the chaos, there is hope.
God can bring us from our place of anxiety to dwell fully in God’s holy
habitation. It’s a slow process and we
may feel that we have been in exile forever, but things can change. God can break the implements of the wars that
rage inside us. The LORD of hosts is with
us; the God of Jacob is our refuge. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14pt; line-height: 107%;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Let
us pray: LORD, life giver and lover of all, we pray for those who experience
anxiety and times of distress. We pray that your presence may be known to them
and that they might be strengthened to be still and know that you are God. We
pray also for those who have begun the path of continual refocus upon you. We pray that they may someday arrive at your
holy habitation, no matter how long their journey may be. Lord, help us remember that you are our
refuge and strength, and we can turn to you in all of our times of
trouble. In the name of the Father, and
of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, Amen. </span><span style="color: #44546a;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5784646455209980456.post-16177422020996458672014-02-02T18:18:00.001-08:002014-02-02T18:18:29.671-08:00Why do we go to church?This is the question that has been on my mind for a while now. Why do we go to church? What is the point of gathering as a community on Sunday mornings for a service of worship? <br />
It's easy for me to get caught up in the details of what I love about worship. I grew up going to church and have always felt the need to attend worship services. But we live in an age where many did not go to church as a child or never felt connected to a church community. There are others who take Sunday mornings as precious family time or a time to relax with a paper and a cup of coffee. They can find God through moments of sabbath relaxation.<br />
So what are we really to say when asked why worship services are important? Can't we find the spiritual in many realms, not just the Sunday morning service? Can't we connect with community in a variety of ways?<br />
I have spent time trying to figure out why Sunday morning worship is important to me, and why worship services in general are important. <br />
I am a person who likes to live in a rhythm. My routine may alter on a daily basis, but there are moments in my days and my weeks that are set in stone. Worship is one of those things that I guard. For me, there is something about scripture, sermon, and sacrament that speaks to my innermost being. There is something real that happens in those spaces. In my teenage years, church was the one place where I could get my mind off my own needs and focus outward on something that was bigger than me. That was freeing. <br />
As a seminary student, I get caught up in different worship practices, some that I like and some that I loath. I can easily find myself analyzing rather than engaging. I find myself drawn out of worship to ask questions like, "Why would they use that hymn?" and "Did they really mean to do that?" I still find that space with God, and I still worship, but I get caught up in the mundane. Worship is familiar and I can come into it knowing exactly what will happen. It is as familiar to me as grocery shopping. The layout may change from time to time, but I know what to expect and I always come out with the things that can nourish me.<br />
I wonder what a person who had never been in a worship service might actually notice. They might have an analysis going on their head about the worship service, but they would not automatically know what was happening next. Even things as familiar to me as the Lord's Prayer might be new. What would they see? Why would they want to be there? Why would they go to church?<br />
And the why is often very different than the what. People come into church for a variety of reasons, but mostly they come searching for some sort of meaning. So what would they see? What would they see in a building laid out like a concert hall with a praise band and a casually dressed, conversational preacher? What would they see in a large cruciform cathedral with a large choir, a roaring organ, a large altar party, and a celebrant adorned in a chausible? Neither is better than the other, and the adornments may neither draw someone in or push someone away. <br />
What the person is searching for is meaning, for some sort of answers to a number of life's questions. So the real question, the question that seems so basic it almost gets forgotten when approaching this topic is this: What is our message? <br />
Do we present Jesus as a personal Lord and Savior, or do we present Jesus as the head of a corporate body of Christ? Do we get caught up in personal sin or do we search diligently to corporately bring about Kingdom moments in a fragile and broken world? Do we live personal salvation or corporate salvation? The answer should be yes. Both are necessary, but I think often churches lean one way or another. It's not wrong to speak of a personal savior, nor is it wrong to speak of a corporate body. But to live into the Church is to keep both the personal and corporate in conversation. <br />
The person coming to the worship service is seeking. If someone is feeling isolated, too much individualistic talk may create the impression that we are supposed to seek on our own. They may need to hear the message of living into the body and being accepted by and connected to the community. If someone feels like they are losing themselves in the crowd and are trying to gain a better sense of identity, they may need a message of a personal Christ. <br />
So why do we come to church? Why do we get up and gather together into a worship space? Why don't we just find the spiritual on our own? I think that the message of a personal Christ is true and still speaks, but the idea of the corporate Christ has been pushed away. We can individually find Christ, but it is much easier to live Christ in community. We worship together so we can bond together in our connection to God. It is that bond of humans seeking together that can transform and inform life in ways that could never be done alone. I think that is why we come to church, and why worship services still matter. Praise bands and thurifers are just window dressings to an experience that brings a unique community together to corporately celebrate Christ and give each other permission to dream of their own role in the coming Kingdom. <br />
<br />The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0